Law jokes

What did the ferret say after his family was questioned by police?

It's none of your business!

A: What did the lawyer say to the amputee?

Q: You haven't got a leg to stand on.

Police: Come with me, I’m taking you home.

Orphan: Well, we need to find them first.

Police: Then I don’t need to take you home.

If her age is on the timer, I don't care if she's a minor.

People should've recognized that Jared Fogle was a sick offender by one coded Subway sandwich; he normally claimed to kids he ate the sweet onion chicken teriyaki when it was the tuna sub.

Tuna sub was the message of the target to the kid since "tuna sub" put together makes "tunasub" and the truth comes when you spell it in reverse ("busanut")!

Why was the belt placed under arrest?

For holding up a pair of pants. 🤣

What did the man who had sex with an Instagram model in the reverse cowgirl position while going 90 on the freeway get charged for?

Driving under the influencer.

Someone complimented me on my driving last week. They left a note saying, "Parking Fine!"

I like my women like my family, they’re related.

What do you call a nut in jail?

A busted nut.

Why can't an orphan be a criminal?

Because they aren't wanted.

Why was the belt arrested?

It held up a pair of pants.

What's red, takes my belt, and what I got from a weird children's house?

An orphan.

Good morning, madam. I am from the local council. Can you please tell me if you have a dog license for that poodle you have on your head?

So, if being a paedophile is a career, then burying the bodies must be gardening.

What's the difference between bounties and orphans?

The bounty is wanted.

You're so ugly when your mom dropped you off at school, she got a fine for littering.

For someone to be stealing a bag of gold in Heaven, [they are] a criminal on Earth and [in] Heaven.

Why do orphans wish they had a bounty on them so that they can be wanted?

Why didn't Michael Jackson get away with messaging with kids? Because they were all juveniles.