Law jokes

What does an orphan not have in common with a criminal?

Criminals are wanted.

So, I went up to an Australian girl. She looked like she was 20, and I said, "Can I have your phone number, sweetheart?" She said, "696969." I said, "Oh, haha, okay." A few days later, her mother called me and said she's 15.

A drunk guy runs into a bar... He bangs his head and falls down, why?

Because he is in a prison cell.

@shelby denver is a massive nonce.

Why did I f*** my dad?

So I could have s€x without my mom finding out. Should I not have done that?

What do you call the only Trump Supporter to follow his orders to obstruct justice?

Answer: Attorney General William Barr!

I’m here to collect my bounty, what’s your bounty? Your pants.

Me: Hi Jaiden.

Bully/Jaiden Harper: Leave me alone, weirdo.

Me: Wow, says the one who didn't pass 3rd grade.

Bully/Jaiden Harper: *hits*

Me: *calls FBI and puts on gloves and stabs random person then gives knife to Jaiden and takes off gloves* Bye bye.

FBI: FBI OPEN UP!!!!!!!!!

Why am I in jail?

All I did was cause 9/11.

Why do orphans want to be criminals?

To be wanted.

I got hired by an orphan to commit crimes, so he could become wanted.

The hardest part of picking up a hitch hiker is tying them up.

Was busy robbing a house as quietly as possible and saw a woman catching me in the act, decided to get her in on the act and gave away my location from the noise.

My life is so meaningless that I committed a crime just to get shot. 0-0

This is not a joke; this is just about death...

Law is temporary. Syria is eternal.

Amber Heard Daily Routine:

Get out of bed, drink coffee, take a shit on Johnny Depp's bed.

Stop sign: If you speed, I'll call your parents.

Orphans: Going 180.

A friend of mine told me something that I cannot forget, and I am now traumatized to hell. The next day a kid was set for an amber alert that looked exactly like my DEAR friend! :)

"Lock him up, you know, Trump!"

The doctor gave his patient 1 day of life, so he shot him. Then the judge gave him 15 years, so there you go, problem solved.