Law jokes

Why are there no guns in China? They might do some "ting wong!"

What does the sign say on the hooker house after they were on lockdown?

Answer: "We're on lockdown, get lost pervert."

What is the most expensive type of sex you will ever enjoy in your life? The type which will shorten your life by 5 to 10 years.

I gotta do terrorist :)

How many police officers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, they just beat the room for it being black.

So, if being a paedophile is a career, then burying the bodies must be gardening.

Man and woman are having a discussion. The woman looks into the man's eyes and says, "Honey, you know how I like it when you walk up and stick it in . . . "

". . . but I love it when Bob walks up and sticks it in!"

Divorce is scheduled for next month.

Greg is a pedo.

What's the best part of having sex with a baby?

Deep throat and anal at the same time.

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

I know a pedophile,

And he says he knows you.

Why did Timmy throw the clock out the window?

It reminded him of Arnold Clock, the man convicted of knife raping his wife.

If you punch an orphan, what are they going to do, tell their parents?

What do you call a fat man with a rape whistle? Hogan!

I molested a child today, and it felt quite lovely on my penis! 👍

What do you call an Asian that steals cars? Tommy toke a motor.

If someone made a comedy routine about Terri Schiavo, would that be considered roasting a vegetable?

When do you go at stop and stop when done?

I don't know, I'm not a pedophile.

"You suck. I don't wanna be married anymore ://////"

Why does an orphan commit a crime?

Because it wants to be wanted.

Why do asses make the best detectives?

They always crack the case!