Language jokes
Eh.
A hand job from a deaf person counts as oral.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
I did ap.
I did ap who? (I did a poo)
EEWW you did a poo???
What do the Mafia and pussies have in common?
One slip of the tongue, and you’re in deep shit.
Want to hear a joke about prostitution?
Never mind, it's whoreable :)
What do clams do on their birthday? They shell-brate, but they eat all the cake for themselves because they’re shellfish!
Hey, Squidward, say "kid" backward. Also, suck my dick!
Spell "I C U P." I see you pee.
Spell "I cup."
I see you pee.
Want to hear a joke about prostitution? Never mind, it's whoreable.
Ukraine.
An Oxymoron: A “Normal Autistic”.
Why is 8 scared of 7?
Because 7 8 9. If you think it doesn't make sense, then it is "7 ate 9."
Tell someone to spell "Icup."
Answer: It will say, "I see you pee!"
An Asian walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Do you, too, sing 'One Long Toy Cow'?"
The bartender says to the Asian, "Sorry, I don't speak Chinese."
Why did the Italian cross the road?
C'era un uliveto.
The numbers 19 and 20 got into a fight. 21!
There was a plane crash. The pilot's names were Captain Sum Ting Wong, Wi Tu Lo, Ho Lee Fuk, and Bang Ding Ow.
You call it turds.
I call it the forbidden chocolate.
It’s important to establish a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between the words “antidote” and “anecdote,” one of my best friends would still be alive.