Kid jokes
Q: How do you get the retard kid out of the tree?
A: Wave at him.
+1 like = 1 kid in my basement.
+1 follower = 1 kid in my Microwave.
+1 Comet.
What did the make-a-wish kid say to the staff? "I don't wanna go to Disneyland, I wanna live longer."
Ms. Norsworthy's chompers are so big they killed a kid once.
This kid was going to sleep and he said, "Night, Mum. Night, Dad. And night, Grandma, and bye, Grandpa." The next morning, Grandpa died, and the next night he said, "Night, Dad. Night, Mum. Night, Grandma." Grandma died the next morning. The next night he said, "Night, Mum, bye, Dad," and they heard the postman died because he was the dad, lol.
What's the similarities between dark humor and cancer?
It's funnier when kids get it.
How is a child molester and Harambe the same? They both get shot for touching little kids.
When you go to an orphanage for a field trip: When the workers said, "I remember you as a kid."
An orphan is like marriage. The kid is always the reason for divorce. The kid is always the reason for his parents leaving him.
Q. What do you call a biracial kid in a vegetative state?
A. A mixed vegetable.
Wat is a kids gajfnjafb movie? A sjdhfsdjfmksdf LOL
What is the similar thing between alcohol and anal sex?
They are not for kids.
I met another kid with Down syndrome the other day and attempted to talk to him. But my mom showed up and was asking me why I am talking to the mirror.
God sent a kid to the principal's office for giving a blind kid sunglasses and said, "Don't let the sun damage your eyes!"
"What’s your name, son?" the principal asked his student. The kid replied, “D-d-d-dav-dav-david, sir.” "Do you have a stutter?" the principal asked. The student answered, “No sir, my dad has a stutter but the guy who registered my name was a real jerk.”
I made Google Earth for orphan kids.
Sadly, it does not show where home is.
A robber held up a depressed kid at gun point.
The depressed kid took the gun, and said, "I'll do it myself."
I swear, in America, one school shooter can take good care of hundreds of kids, but hundreds of soldiers can't even win a war. Might as well send all your school shooters over there.
"Oh daddy," the kid said. "I love you so much!"
"Hey," the man responded. "Until we get the DNA test results, I'm just Harry to you!"
These girls were bullying a kid. I asked if they were raping him. They stopped.