Kid jokes
what did the pedophile say to the kid?
"Roses are red, my name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van."
What do kids and drugs have in common? I sell both of them.
Why was the emo kid sad? Because his bar code expired.
When the school shooter is right outside the classroom window, and the autistic kid starts trying to say hello to him.
I was at a funeral for some kids in a school shooting. I don’t understand why everyone was so sad, so I asked a lady, "what’s so sad?" and she said, "What do you think was running through these kid’s head before they died?" I replied, "probably a bullet." She gasped and said, "do you have any idea how insensitive that is? What do you think is running through their parent’s heads?" I said "probably all the money they're losing from this funeral."
My pregnant wife said we were gonna name the kid Digiorno. She wouldn't tell me why until she got an abortion and told me, "It's not delivery, it's Digiorno."
A Down syndrome kid asks for an ice cream. The man asks, "Do you want sauce on it?"
The kid says, "It doesn’t matter, I’m going to drop it anyway!" 😂😂😂
What do you call an emo kid with light up shoes?
A human chandelier.
When you were supposed to help the depressed kid, but not "help" the depressed kid.
What do Drake and math have in common? They’re both hard for kids.
Kid: "Dark humor is like a mother's love."
Orphan: "How?"
Kid: "You wouldn't know."
Orphan: "........."
Q: Why was the depressed kid sad on Christmas?
A: They weren't hanging like the ornaments on a tree.
How do you get an emo kid to jump?
A bridge.
Why do kids prefer to spend more time with their dad than their mom?
They already know that their dad is gonna get "Milk" and never return.
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome on the beach?
A baked potato.
Teacher: "I was an orphan when I was a kid."
Students: "oof"
Teacher: "Is anyone missing?"
Students: "Yeah, your parents."
Give a blind kid a torch and tell him it's a hairdryer.
How does a peadophile help a kid with maths? He adds the bed, divides the clothes, and multiplies with the whole classroom.
What did the Asian parents say when they had a disabled kid?
Sum ting wong.
A kid gets home from school and finds his mom and dad having sex. The kid asks, "What are you doing, Dad?" The dad replies, "Having sex with your mom, son," and he starts laughing.
The next day, Dad gets home from work and finds his son having sex with his nan. The dad shouts, "What the hell are you doing, son?" The kid replies, "It's not funny when it's your mom, is it?"