Kid jokes

So I saw a 15 year old kid near a 15 year old girl checking her out.

Then I told him, "What are you doing?"

He told me he will decorate her locker, donate a lot of money to her, and buy her a lot of stuff.

He then told me how easy would that be?

I told him: "That sounds pretty SIMPle."

Me: Hey, that's a really heavy bag, do you have a lot of books and magazines in there?

The Quiet Kid: Yeah, magazines.....

+1 like = 1 kid in my basement.

+1 follower = 1 kid in my Microwave.

+1 Comet.

Go to an orphanage and tell a kid his parents came back.

When you're sitting by the mushrooms and you hear one say to the other "Hey, you're a fun guy."

Why do emo kids not get phones? Because the phone dies before them.

Why did the emo kid like the all black Oreos?

'Cause they're dark.

Me running after slapping the emo kid's wrist and saying, "I like ya cut g."

You're so slow, the sped kid is your tutor.

Four kids at my school tried suicide and failed. They are now known as the Suicide Squad.

How did Fortnite record their henchman sounds?

They asked a bunch of kids with Down syndrome to film a documentary.

What is the difference between a kid with cancer and dark humor?

Dark humor never dies!

How are an emo kid and a hanging child the same?

Depends on who's hanging.

There was a doctor's room filled with 20 women, 4 kids, 15 men, and 1 dog. However, there were forty foreheads. How is this possible?

(They will think 44 heads, not 40 foreheads.)

Because there are 40 foreheads, not 44 heads.

There's a disabled kid in my class, right? Oops, should've brought my Hot Wheels tracks.

Why does Michael Jackson do positions with kids in photos? Because they won’t do the same for him.

What do you call a white kid at the back of class?

A school shooter.

I saw this kid who looked depressed, so I threw a torch at him. I thought I would brighten up his day.

What's the similarity between pedophiles and school shooters?

They both shoot when they see kids.

What’s one thing you can say during a family dinner and in bed?

"Where are the kids?"