Kid jokes
On a hot summer's day, a famous celebrity tweeted, "It is a beautiful day, and I'm deciding which kid to have fun with today." To which the local priest replied, "I too am deciding which of your kids to have fun with today."
August 2020: LeafyIsHere gets terminated on Youtube for harassing Pokimane.
Billy, a toxic kid in Leafy's fanbase: "Imane's life is a joke, that's why I call her Jokeimane."
A person who simps for Pokimane: "And you look like you came from a farm, Hillbilly."
What do you call a special needs kid with a motorcycle?
Motor disease.
What's the difference between me and a depressed kid? At least I'm out of the grave.
Teacher: What’s the closest planet?
Kids yell: Sun.
Except for one.
Other kid: Uranus.
Teacher: Uranus?
Other kid: Yeah, it’s right there.
What do you call an autistic kid with a rocket ship? A cocker.
Why do emo kids cost so much?
Because they’re the only people you can scan at the checkout machine.
What do you call a kid with 15 nukes and a shotgun?
The final countdown.
What do you call a kid named Caitlyn?
My best friend.
Once, there was a Minecraft child molester on the Minecraft Facebook. He asks a kid his age. The kid blocks him.
Once I went to watch a match in Portugal. It was between Penaldo and his kids. The referee was Georgiana (his wife). Mpaypal and Igayspeed were also there. The match began, and his kids scored two goals in the first 10 minutes. Then, when the match was about to end, Penaldo got angry and asked his wife for penalties. His wife declined, and he tortured and beat her up and took 10 penalties (missed 7 of them) but won 3-2. Shame on you, Penaldo! 😡😡😡
Q: What happens to KID who NAPs near a stranger?
A: He gets KID-NAPPED (kidnapped).
I am the ice cream man running over fat kids with my van. If you touch my van, I’ll smack you in the face with a frying pan. If you steal ice cream, I’ll shoot you in the face with a fudge machine.
In case there's a school shooting, the teachers can help out and shoot the kids.
Why do dwarfs do drugs?
To get high.
Billy and Nanny have 2 kids.
A disabled kid kept throwing up in class.
So I threw him out the window!
A kid annoyed me the other day. I told him to shut up and go back to his parents. That's the last time I'm going to an orphanage.
Why do some kids only experience 364 days per year?
Because they don't have a Father's Day.
Kid 1: Guys, stop making 9/11 jokes. My dad died in 9/11.
Kid 2: Sorry, I didn't know.
Kid 1: He was the best fighter pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.