Me running after slapping the emo kid's wrist and saying, "I like ya cut g."
Kid Jokes
Why can't two Asians have a white kid?
Because two wongs don't make a white.
My little cousin's birthday was in a few days, and his mom said he wanted Hot Wheels. So I sent him a video of me pushing a paralyzed kid into fire and screaming "HOT WHEELS!"
Kid: Your mom!
Orphan: (cries)
Why can’t Helen Keller have kids?
Answer: She’s dead.
There's a kid named Little Johnny who would always cuss. Well, one day, he was sitting in class and the teacher said, "Let's play a game." So the game was she calls out a letter and someone raises her hand and tells her a word that begins with that letter. The teacher says "A". Little Johnny raises his hand and the teacher thinks to herself, "Well, he might say something like a**." So the teacher calls on Sally. Sally says "apple". The teacher says "B". Little Johnny raises his hand. The teacher thought, "No, he might say something like b!tch." So the teacher goes all the way to R. The teacher says "R". Little Johnny raises his hand and says, "Me, me, please, I really know one." Then the teacher thinks to herself, "Well, there's no cuss word that starts with R," so she said, "Okay, Johnny, give me a word that starts with R." Little Johnny says, "A rat!" and the teacher, very pleased, says, "Very good, Johnny. What type of rat?" Little Johnny says, "A big gosh damn mother freaker."
Sorry, I had to edit some word, but y'all know what I meant.
When the school shooter pulls the fire alarm, and the autistic kid thinks it’s a rave party.
Kid: My parents want to meet you, you wanna come over?
Orphan: Na, I'm good. I'm going to watch Home Alone. It's the only movie that I can think of that's related to me.
In case there's a school shooting, the teachers can help out and shoot the kids.
An orphan was playing with a famous baseball player. The baseball player walks up to him and says, "Dude, I gotta teach you." The orphan goes, "Why? I got all your moves down." The baseball player goes, "But kid, you can never find home, though."
What do you call an autistic kid that’s good at art?
Artistic.
I like my kids how I like my lights, Hanging from the ceiling.
What do you say to a kid in a trash compactor?
You looking a little square.
This is a bad one but why do orphans hate their life even more in 2021?
Cause kids just laugh at them...
Mom: Anna, let your younger brother have the sled one half of the time, and you the other half. That way it will all be fair, and I don't have to put up with this crying. I've already got seven others to take care of.
Anna: I do, Mom. I have Fred (younger brother) go up, and I go down!
Mom: Good. Now how 'bout the rest of you go play outside? It's beautiful out there! It's the warmest it's been all year, 45 degrees below 0!
Kids: Wow! I never thought it would warm up! I love Alaska!
"It never gets old."
"Just like a sick kid!"
Q: What did one emo kid say to the other emo kid?
A: Wanna hang out?
When the school shooter kills five people, and the autistic kid yells, "Heroes never die!"
What do you call an epileptic kid?
Little Seizures.
How do you get the depressed kid out of the tree? You cut the rope.
