Kid jokes

Wanna hear a joke? My life! Hahahah! Just kidding, jokes actually mean something...

BofA deez nuts!

Kid with Cancer: "When I get older, I want to be a movie star or a singer."

Nurse: *Laughs*

Kid: "Why are you laughing?"

Nurse: "When I get OLDER."

Proceeds to laugh.

What does a kid do when he's bored and he's sitting? He puts wheels on the chair and makes it a wheelchair.

I gave a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hairdryer.

Kid: Mom, do trees poop?

Mom: Yes. That is how we get #2 pencils.

Kid: Dad, what is it like to be drunk?

Dad: You see those two trees over there? If you were drunk, you would see four.

Kid: Dad, there is only one tree.

To all the children on this website, hello!!!!! Hey!!!! How is life treating you?

(BTW I'm a kid, too. I'm Hayley, and I'm turning 13. My B-day is 10/08/2008.)

Kids are so ungrateful sometimes. I bought a wheelchair for my son. Did he say thank you? Nope! That mtf just sat in his wheelchair the whole time crying the whole day. 😐

Why does the adopted kid like playing GTA? Because he wants to be wanted.

Kid: "What's dark humor?"

Mom: "You see that man over there without arms? Tell him to clap."

Kid: "I am blind, Mom."

Mom: "Exactly."

Parent: Have you seen your sister?

Son: No, the last time I saw her was when we were playing hide and seek.

What is the difference between a sloth and a depressed kid? A sloth doesn't need a rope to hang.

When the school shooter enters the classroom and it's the quiet kid's dad.

"Look at these kids stealing ideas, bro. They're going to jail."

Why is there a middle school?

Because the kids that go there are middle class families.

Why do kids like bananas?

'Cause they like doing the nana.

VOTING FINAL This vote is for the best School Shooter joke of the month.

LIKE: When the school shooter is about to leave your classroom and the autistic kid’s sketchers light up.

DISLIKE: When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say “This boy always had a fat ass”.

Vote for the better joke and the Joke of the Month will be announced in the comments tomorrow.

So a mom went to her kid and said, "If you pray to God, He will give you your sight back." So he did exactly that.

The next morning, the mom heard a scream, so she went to the kid's room and asked, "What's wrong?" The kid replied, "It didn't work!" The mom said, "April Fools!"

VOTING QUARTERFINAL 3: LIKE: When the school shooter throws a smoke grenade into the classroom and the autistic kid thinks it’s a Disco party. 🕺🕺🕺

DISLIKE: When the school shooter gets killed and everyone is cheering but you walk toward his gun; “I will finish what you started.”

Vote for the better joke.