People keep telling me that I should stop making sh jokes.. bro it's not that deep
Got into a fight last night. We both had blades. He cut me deep. I thought I was gone, but he forgot to keep the water running.
Weird thing was that we were in the fight of our lives in the restroom and that guy kinda look like me.
Johnny: Mommy, Mommy! What is incest? Mom: Shut up and keep licking.
It's been raining for days. My wife is totally depressed. She keeps looking through the window. If this keeps up, I'll have to let her in.
I keep getting these letters from this little girl every year on fathers day. I told the orphanage to stop letting her send these.
If prostitution had a tax exempt status and if a adult book store had a tax exempt status because of a glory hole churches would have to do something else to keep their tax exempt status to avoid the risk of going out of business
So I was going out the door and I see me dwarf neighbour at the bus stop, I ask if he needs a lift. He replies with fu.. off. So I zip up my backpack and keep going to work
Children are like a box of Christmas decorations. I keep ‘em in my basement until it’s time to hang ‘em from a tree.
Girls are like blackjack you shoot for 21 but I keep hitting 14
The reason that 👧 👧 are not 🚫 in 👦 👦 👦 👦 👦 🌳 🏘️ is because 👧 👧 can't keep their 👄 👄 👄 👄 shut about 👦 👦 👦 👦 👦 taking turns sucking each others 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭
My mom is the jelly and my dad is the peanut butter And I am the bread the only thin keeping them together.
Why do hospitals have fans? To keep the vegetables fresh and cold.
What's worse than failed attempted suicide? The pity looks people gives you and people keeps u away from 'dangerous' things
Why did the squirrel do the backstroke? He wanted to keep his nuts dry.
How do you make someone in Africa disappointed
Sing raindrops keep falling on my head
The furniture store keeps calling me back... But all I wanted was that one nightstand.
whats the difrence between hitler and you
one didnt keep posting on twiter about killing them selfs
Unlike my syndrome I keep my chin up 🙌🏽😁
Knock knock
Who's there
Insomnia
You'll fit right in along with Depression and anxiety, you can help keep me awake at night because Depression is struggling with that... Well now I can 't cry myself to sleep anymore...
My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, "No, wait! I can change."
