Joke jokes
How do you know when your girlfriend is too young?
You have to make airplane noises to get her to open her mouth.
Sorry.
About the guy who gave Stevie Wonder a cheese grater...
He thought it was the most violent book he'd ever read.
What flour do orphans use when baking? Self-Raising (Rising).
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it!
What's Gru's favorite Beyoncé lyric? "Who run the world... Gorls."
Wanna know what is offensive? I don't know, ask feminist (sans undertale).
Your spelling is more morbid than any of these jokes.
Does your shoe have a hole in it?
No.
Then how did you put your foot in it?
What do you call a feminist with a rape whistle? Delusional and optimistic.
Before the chicken or the egg, there was only Chuck Norris.
Where do sick boats go? The dock!
My friend made this joke (so I’m going steal it). I’m surrounded by fat people, oh wait... it’s just one.
Jeff asks, "Did you hear about the guy they call the flash?"
Bob responds, "No, I haven't. Do they call him that because he runs fast?"
Jeff replies, "Nah, they call him that because he doesn't wear pants."
There's two types of emo people:
1. People that cut side to side.
2. And people that cut up and down.
The most efficient is up and down.
- I think you're EGGcellent.
+ Wow... You really CRACK ME UP with that joke. I think you're a EGGxtraordinary comedian.
- Really? Are you done yet?.
+ Are you kidding? I have a DOZEN of them.
"And then I said, \"Knife to meet you.\""
"You stabbed my brother!"
"It's okay, I'm in stable condition!"
The new pandemic is feminism and all kinds of democratic thinking. COVID is a joke compared to these nasty ass diseases.
How much pussy does a priest get? None.
What is the difference between a wagon filled with sand and a wagon filled with newborns?
You cannot unload the sand with a pitchfork.
Why are orphans so skinny?
They never eat anything that is family size.