Joke jokes
I will always remember my dad's last words....
"15 dollars and I'll jump."
Sans: Zzzzzzzz
Papyus: SANS WAKE UP!!
Sans: What is it dude?
Papyus: A human has fallen from the surface world!
Sans: And you gotta BONE to pick with 'em??
Papyus: Grrrrr....
Sans: Oh come on that was a real RIBTICKLER.
What did one fish say to the other?
Keep your mouth shut and you'll never get caught.
I was gonna say when you were born your mum saw you and screamed, but I remembered you were adopted...
What is the difference between a boomerang and an orphan's dad?
The boomerang comes back.
How does an Alabama mother know when her daughter is on her period? She can taste the blood on her son’s penis.
Kid. What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?
Teacher. What?
Kid. Fruity pebbles with water.
Teacher. Why water?
Kid. Cause his dad never came back with the milk.
These jokes are so dark that their life matters.
What does a perverted frog say?
"Rubbit."
Friend: How dark IS your humor?
Me: It started an organization against cops.
A lady walks into a dentist's office, sits on the counter, and spreads her legs. The dentist says, "I think you have the wrong idea." The lady replies, "Last week you gave my husband his false teeth; now you can get them out."
What's a paedophile's favorite footwear?
White Vans.
What’s red and very rare?
A baby in a blender.
What do you call a Russian man with three balls?
'Whodya nikabollokov'
What’s the difference between dark humor and morbid humor?
Dark humor is ten kids in one container; morbid humor is one kid in ten containers.
These two cannibals are sitting by the campfire having dinner. One says, "I can't stand my mother-in-law." The other says, "So, just eat the potatoes."
Three men walk into heaven at the same time. They all live in the same city. God asks the first man, "How did you die?" The man says, "I have a heart condition, and I've been suspecting my wife of cheating for some time. Anyway, I get home from work and I see my wife on the bed and a man hanging off the balcony. I get so mad and stomp on the guy's fingers! He falls into a bush, so I throw a refrigerator on him." God asks the next man, "How did you die?" The man says, "I was cleaning the windows, and then this crazy man starts stomping on my fingers! Luckily, I fall safely in a bush! But then a refrigerator falls on me!" God asks the third man, and he says, "I was the one in the fridge!"
Why did the orphan become a prostitute?
Because they needed someone to call "daddy".
Why did the octopus cross the road?
To get to the other TIDE!!! 🤣🐙🐙
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone chucked a brick at her.
Why did Sally throw a clock out the window? She had brain damage from the brick.