Joke jokes
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You make them clap until they go home.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To finally get his milk.
I tried to tell an orphan a knock-knock joke, but sadly, there was no door to knock on.
Why do orphans always have water in their cereal? Because the dad never came back with the milk.
Kid. What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?
Teacher. What?
Kid. Fruity pebbles with water.
Teacher. Why water?
Kid. Cause his dad never came back with the milk.
A joke becomes a dad joke when it leaves for milk and never comes back.
What do you call a Russian man with three balls?
'Whodya nikabollokov'
What's a furry's favorite news network?
Fox!
Son: "Dad, are we pyromaniacs?"
Dad: "Yes, we arson."
Why was 10 scared of 9?
Because 9 8 7.
What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
You can unscrew a light bulb.
The police department made a new machine that will teleport you back to prison if you commit a crime. The police release 4 criminals: a hacker, a rapist, a serial killer, and a drug lord. The hacker tries to hack a bank. The hacker gets teleported back to prison. The drug lord tries to cook meth. The drug lord gets teleported back to prison. Now the serial killer decides that she wants to change, but when she sees a knife she just can’t help it. She bends down to pick up the knife and the rapist gets teleported back to prison.
Holy shit there's so many yo mama jokes. Here's mine: Yo mama so skinny she used a cheerio as a hula hoop.
Yo mama so fat that she made a plane unstable and crashed it into the Twin Towers.
Yo mama so old that she has Jesus's autograph.
Yo mama so ugly that not even makeup can save her.
Yo mama so dumb that she thought Rocket League was a competition between kids in wheelchairs.
What did everyone say about the crazy unemployed homeless man?
He made no cents.
Q: What's the difference between an egg and me?
A: An egg gets laid.
These murder jokes are just KILLING me!
Why did Susie get cut from the soccer team? She has no legs!
Who broke into my house by kicking down my door? Not Susie... But she still is in my basement, since she can't run!
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo? Head and Shoulders.
I am an actual police officer (Not gonna mention with which department in case they actually check this site) and tbh I find these jokes funny as fuck, carry on boys.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the udder side.