Joke jokes
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Or at least it does if you throw it hard enough.
Why is it that if you donate a kidney, people love you? But if you donate five kidneys, they call the police.
My senior relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying things like, “You’ll be next!” They stopped once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
Why did the orphan go to church?
So he had someone to call Father.
What was Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro.
I say "cow poop," cows say "moonure."
What do u call a pretty Indian girl?
Bomb bae.
If you drive a Lamborghini, then you have a tiny weenie.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Fence 1 was thinking and Fence 2 said, "Are you still on the fence about running away?"
Fence 1 said, "Yeah, I was thinking of running on the RAILROAD."
What do you call a wild cow in a shop with old things?
A bull in a china shop.
What's black, white, and red all over?
Lossvagus school shooting.
Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboard?
Don't worry, he was just going through a stage.
What’s cheese that’s not yours? Nacho cheese!
How do you trick a homophobic heterosexual male that is a Roman Catholic priest into using the glory hole inside the men's restroom at a gay bar?
Tell him that it is a confessional booth.
Why did Sally fall out the window?
She was pushed.
What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose?
Full.
Don't leave us hanging, Sayori.
Guys, this has to stop. Let's tell their parents. Oh wait...
Why do orphans eat their cereal with water?
Because their dad never came back with the milk! 😂🤣
I dipped my hand in red food dye, so I said, "Looks like I’ve been caught red-handed!"
How many homeless guys does it take to change a lightbulb?
“You’re telling me there’s change in a lightbulb?”