Joke jokes
Why did the woman throw her bills out the window? She wanted to send them via airmail.
How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?
As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.
I told a joke and someone said, "no one asked." Then I said, "no one would care to even ask."
If you give someone a plane ticket, they will fly for a day, but if you push them out of a plane, they'll fly for the rest of their life.
Guys, we need to stop making jokes about orphans. Their parents might get upset. Oh, wait... never mind.
Give a man a match, he'll be warm for hours.
Light the man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo?
Head N Shoulders.
What’s an orphan's favorite drink?
Fosters.
What’s the difference between an orphan and a tomato?
The tomato gets picked.
Two men ran into a bar. You would have thought after the first one hit it, the second one would have seen it.
Why did all the numbers mourn 10? Because he was in the middle of 9, 11.
Yah, hurtful towards you. Bro took it personally, literally.
What do you say to a depressed person on the ceiling?
Hang in there!
What was one phrase Michael Jackson said to a boy in his bed? Baby, be mine.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?... one gets picked.
What is an orphan's favorite period? Homeroom.
Why was the orphan so successful?
They told him, "Go big or go home," he only had one option.
Your friend walks up to you and shows you a picture of an overweight woman.
What would you rate this woman?
A 7.
Why?
Because 7 ate 9!
Just hire some people to be fake parents and print off an adoption paper. On April Fools', just leave them there at the orphanage! APRIL FOOLS!
Why did Helen Keller's cat run away? I would run away if my name was jufhvfhvurhkso.