Joke jokes
Q: How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?
A: He forgot to wrap his Whopper.
What’s the difference between a chromosome and a hormone?
You can hear a hormone.
I was going to make a chemistry joke. But it looks like I won’t get a reaction :)
It's not rape if she doesn't say no.
Two options: - Chloroform. - Duct Tape.
James: I have a joke. Sex!
Ronny: I don't get it.
James: Exactly.
Even my school is making the jokes lmao
How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
To get to the other side!
Why did Stephen Hawking die? He ran out of data.
I am a registered sex offender. I'm just playing, I'm not registered yet.
Why was 10 afraid?
Because he was in the middle of 9/11.
Your forehead is so big and shiny it looks like a solar field.
You can't say Hitler was a bad person. He did kill Hitler after all.
Me: My girlfriend broke up with me yesterday, and I had her wheelchair.
Me: Guess who came crawling right back?
Damn bro, are you Gold, Titanium, Sulfur, Titanium, and Carbon?
Cuz you be lookin AuTiSTiC.
What do you call someone with an extra chromosome winning in a pool?
Posiedown.
A man is driving down the road and runs over a rabbit. He slams on his brakes, gets out, and walks up to the flattened bunny. The bunny is obviously expired.
A passing car slams on its brakes and screeches to a halt. The driver of that car runs up to the bunny, pulls out an aerosol can, and sprays the bunny with the aerosol spray. The bunny jumps up, runs a few feet, then stops, turns around, and waves its paw at the two men. Runs away a few more feet, stops, turns around, and waves at the two men. Runs away a few more feet, stops, turns around, and waves at the two men. He continues to do this until he’s out of sight.
The first driver looks at the man with the aerosol can and says, “Wow, that is amazing! What is in that can?” The man looks at the can and reads the label, “Hair restorer, with a permanent wave.”
How do we know that the ocean is friendly? It waves.
How many fingers am I holding up?
Said the suicide bomber, referring to the countdown.
A limbless man sat on the side of a lake every day. He had no hands or legs.
One day he was crying when a woman was walking by and saw that he was upset, so she asked if he was okay. He replied, "No."
The woman said, "Well, what's wrong?"
The limbless man said, "I've never been hugged by anyone ever."
So the woman, out of kindness, hugged the man. "Are you okay now?" she asked.
"No," the man replied. So again the woman asked him what was wrong. He answered, "I've never been kissed before."
The woman eagerly gave him a peck on the lips and asked, "Are you okay now?"
The man shook his head sadly. The woman asked him what was wrong for the third time. The man said, "I've never been fucked."
The woman looked at him, picks him up, throws him in the lake, and says, "Now you are!"
How many Trump supporters does it take to fix a lightbulb?
None, Trump says it is all done and they cheer in the dark.
What is a gay person’s favorite book?
The dictionary.