Joke jokes
How many brain cells does a pregnant blonde have?
Two, one for her and one for the baby.
When the school shooter pulls the fire alarm, and the autistic kid thinks it’s a rave party.
What cow can part water? Mooses.
Who was purple and wanted to rule the world?
Alexander the Grape.
Why does Santa have three gardens?
So he can Hoe Hoe Hoe!
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo? Heads and Shoulders?
Where did Sarah go after the bombing?
Everywhere. 💀
I once saw a one-handed man in a second-hand store.
I said to him: "I don't think they have what you're looking for, sir."
Did you hear about the kidnapping? Yeah, he woke up.
At the restaurant, the waitress starts flirting with me. "She must have COVID," my wife said. "Why?" I asked. "'Cause she clearly has no taste." She responded.
My mom told me a joke she made 13 years ago, but she didn't tell me what it was... Anyways, I'm turning 14 next month.
What's the difference between you and a fridge? The fridge doesn't moan when I put my meat in.
How do you think the unthinkable? With an iceberg.
Why didn't the koala make the finals? It got diskoalafied.
Slapped cheese on my white friend, told him I like cheese on my crackers.
Kid: "Hey, are you an orphan?"
Friend: "Yeah, but you are too."
Kid: "At least my parents wanted me."
So 6 is scared of 7 because 7, 8, 9, but why did 10 have PTSD?
He was stuck in the middle of 9/11.
I went to my boss's funeral and knelt down to his coffin and whispered, "Whose late now?"
What’s one thing orphans don’t have on their computer? A home page.
What is the difference between the President of Ukraine and the President of the United States?
The President of Ukraine is a comedian, and the President of the United States is a joke!