Joke jokes

What type of people think rape jokes are funny?

Only the coolest people in the world! I fucking love you guys 😂

I don't like 9/11 jokes; they have a tendency to crash and burn.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the gay man's house.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

The chicken.

"Knock Knock!" "Who's there?" "It's Dave!"

"Dave who?"

Dave bursts into tears, realizing that his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

Hitler visits a lunatic asylum. The patients give the Hitler salute. As he passes down the line, he comes across a woman who isn't saluting.

"Why are you not saluting like the others?" Hitler barks.

"Mein Führer, I'm the nurse," she responds. "I'm not crazy!"

What’s the difference between fruit and dead babies?

I don’t put fruit in a blender.

A German soldier is walking down the street during a hail storm when a lady suddenly falls over after being hit. He, along with a few others, walk over to her. One man asks, "What happened?" and the soldier replies, "Hail hit her."

The joke above me sucks.

The difference between dark jokes and morbid is,

dark jokes are 10 babies in 1 trash can, and

morbid jokes are 1 baby in 10 trash cans.

What is the pedophile's favorite shoe?

White vans.

What do children and lights have in common? They both hang from ceilings!

Not funny, here’s another.

Why can’t China play baseball? They ate the bat.

What does a necrophiliac get at a wedding?

Mourning wood.

The teacher asked her student to say the alphabet. The student recited the alphabet: "abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz". "Where's the p?" He looked down to the floor and said: "it's running down my legs".

A man is sitting on a bench at a playground where children are playing. A man named Chris comes up and asks, “Which one is yours?” The man said, “I don’t know, I’m still deciding.”

So we were working with a new client at work, and my boss farts. He said, "A little gas never killed anyone."

Two people just met. One said, “We should do some bonding.” The other nodded and said back, “Titanic.” The first just looked confused so the second one just said, “Sorry, thought that would be a good icebreaker.”

What's an emo person's least favorite game? Cut The Rope.

What did the cake say to the fork?

"Do you want a piece of me!!!"

How do we know that Princess Diana had dandruff?

Because they found her head and shoulders in the glovebox.

I can’t stand disabled jokes...

Neither can they 😂