Joke jokes
What do you call a group of white people running down a hill?
An avalanche.
How do you turn a cat into a fish?
Tell your girl not to wash down there.
Did you know Paul Walker had dandruff?
Neither did I until I found his Head and Shoulders in the glove compartment.
What’s the difference between black matter and Black Lives Matter?
Black matter leaves an impact.
My grandma asked me if I could visit her.
I told her no, I don’t like graveyards.
What does a cannibal do after eating its vegetables?
Sells the wheelchair.
What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in a bathtub?
Throw them some laundry.
My mum told me to stop telling the suicidal jokes.
I replied with: "Don't worry, suicide would be the last thing I'd do."
A guy barges into a psychiatrist’s office and screams, “Doctor! I have suicidal tendencies! What do I do?!”
The doctor calmly answers, “Pay me in advance.”
What’s the difference between Batman and the Black Panther?
Batman returns.
Why didn’t the train kill nine families of four?
Because he had no loco-MOTIVE. AHAHAH
What do you call two gay Irishmen?
Patrick Fitz Gerald, and Gerald Fitz Patrick.
What’s green and yellow and eats at your nuts?
Gonorrhea.
What do you call an orange on a small stick?
Donald Trump.
A woman approached me in the street the other day with one of those charity collection buckets and asked me: Do you know how often people die from AIDS?
I said: Now I'm no expert, but I think it's only once.
What's an emo's favorite way of growing food?
The slash and burn tactic.
Did you hear that Joe contracted Sugondese Ligma on his trip to Suggon, and now he won’t be able to make it to Saw Con?
A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, “Are there any girls here?”
The bartender says, “No, only women.”
The man then leaves.
What did the Twin Towers say to each other?
Sorry if that offended anyone.
“I guess we are going down together!”
Having homosexual parents must be terrible.
Either you have a double dosage of dad jokes or you are stuck in a cycle of "go ask your mom".