Joke jokes
You're so scary that even your hairline ran away.
What’s another name for nutting in a woman?
Loading the dishwasher.
A blind woman tells her boyfriend that she’s seeing someone. It’s either terrible news or great news.
You're not completely useless. You can always be used as a bad example.
What do you call it when you're dead because of that one drink in Panera Bread? Panera dead.
I was going to think of a good amputee joke...
But I’m stumped.
I turned the light on, and my dad said turn it off, so I unplugged his life support.
What is an orphan's least favorite store?
Family Dollar, they just can’t seem to find one.
What do you call a Chinese man in the summer heat? Boi Ling.
Two priests walk into a store, and cops come up to them and say they’re looking for a child molester, and the priests both say, "I’ll do it!"
Why do you never see gay people in wheelchairs?
You can’t be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.
What can jump higher than a basketball player?
An emo kid, they never touch the ground.
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that lives with the royal family?
Rolls Royce.
What did the Japanese man say to his friend after he killed somebody?
"That is very Wong."
When I was recently standing in front of a huge puddle with my buddy, I remembered how he tricked me a week ago. So I tricked him...
Sayori: *dies*
Monika: "You kinda left her hanging... 😊"
MC: "😨"
Sans: "Like, I'm so *flabbergasted*."
Gaster: "👌☼⚐ ✌☼☜ ✡⚐🕆 💧☜☼✋⚐🕆💧 ☼✋☝☟❄ ☠⚐🕈✍"
Asked my dad what LGBT stands for.
He started with "Lettuce? Bacon. Tomato. What's the 'g' for?" Obviously, I had to reply with "Garnish."
At what point does a joke become a dad joke?
When it disappears and never returns home.
Ted Bundy walks into a bar wearing all black. The bartender asks, “Whose funeral is it?”
Ted Bundy looks around the room and replies, “I haven’t decided yet.”