it's jokes

Coffee

2 views ·

Little Johnny said he wanted a coffee, so his mom said he can have one.

He got an espresso, not knowing "depresso" came with it.

Cancer

46 views ·

"I have cancer," the doctor said. "I have 3 days to live," but I was like "fuck it" and killed him. The jury said, "I have life in prison." I shouted, "Yes!" He said, "Thank you, you saved my life!"

Gun

42 views ·

I bought a silencer for my gun, but I don't think it works.

My victims still scream.

Homeless Guy

50 views ·

How many homeless guys does it take to change a lightbulb?

“You’re telling me there’s change in a lightbulb?”

Orphan

12 views ·

Orphans can get away with anything really bad at school, because they can't be sent home for it.

Coffin

4 views ·

What can Michael Jackson eat in his coffin?

Nothing, only brown bread, what they call it! 😂😂😂

Pecker

68 views ·

So little Susie came home and said, "Mom, little Johnny showed me his pecker."

And her mom said, "WHAT?!"

And little Susie was like, "Yeah, it reminded me of a peanut." Her mom said, "Oh, because it was so small?"

Susie said, "No, because it tasted salty."

People

5 views ·

The people at 9/11 must have been able to read fast. If I explain it, it won't be funny. This is an old joke my friend told me.

Feminist

1 view ·

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

One, she just holds the bulb to the socket and waits for the world to revolve around her.

Pilot

32 views ·

What did the pilots say before crashing into the Twin Towers?

"We can't go over it, we can't go under it, we go through it!"