it's jokes
After the holidays, Ron asks Hermione: "How was the weather in Spain?"
Hermione: "No idea, it was so foggy I couldn't see a thing!"
I'm in a wheelchair, right, so I've tried everything but one stand up.
It didn't work.
How do you check that a rabbit is old?
You check how many gray hares it has.
I made Google Earth for orphan kids.
Sadly, it does not show where home is.
Money means nothing to me. Ask me for it, you will get nothing.
It's a Italy day outside the fields.
Happy birthday to you, you look like a ball, can’t fit in my jaws, I try to suck it.
If you're happy and you know it, f*** your mom.
Dora, where do we go next?
Kids at home: Area 51.
Meanwhile,
Dora: Let’s go deliver the evidence to President Biden.
1 day later,
Dora: WE DID IT, HOORAY!
A guy walks into a zoo, but it only has one dog.
It's a shitzu.
So, this woman had a job. She wanted to hang out with her boyfriend, so she lied about having the coronavirus. Then she got out of work. Then she was texting her boss when she thought she was texting her boyfriend. Then she said, "I lied. Now we can...you know...water...sigh...lick...sigh." Then her boss texted, "Ew and YOU'RE FIRED."
One more story: One day this teen named Alexis got kicked out of a house, then went to live with her boyfriend. Then she got pregnant and posted it all on social media.
The Demon when it gets summoned to earth only to find out it was a spelling mistake in Latin class. 😬
Johnny is on his way to school when he comes across a frog. With a sudden inspirational thought, he picks the frog up, shoves a firecracker up the frog's arse, lights the cracker, and blows the frog to smithereens.
Now at school, the teacher asks the class: "Has anybody got anything for show and tell this morning?"
Johnny waves his arm in the air and is virtually screaming "Me mis me mis me mis".
"Ok Johnny, what do you have to share with the class today?"
Little Johnny then says, "Well on my way to school today I shoved a cracker up a frog's arse." The teacher interrupts and says, "It's not arse Johnny, It's rectum."
Johnny then says, "Fucking oath it wrecked 'im."
A man has been dating a girl forever. He finally says, "I love you." The girl says, "Aww, thanks." The man looks at her, "Are you not gonna say it back?" The girl says, "No, I can’t."
Why can you punch an orphan and get away with it?
Because what is he gonna do, tell his parents?
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
It didn't have the guts to do it.
I got a great corona virus joke, but you wouldn’t get it.
Why couldn't the orphan have the bag of chips?
It was family size.
What does Jeffrey tell his white teens?
You want to take it orally or through anal? Joke, I'm not asking.
He: I am 60 and I have to slog 12 hours a day to make a living. Do you call it life?
She: I am 28 and still a virgin, do you call it life?