Intelligence jokes
If I wanted to kill myself, I would just climb up your ego and jump down to your IQ.
My friend: "Yo, stupid."
Me: "Is that right? And what exactly have you done in your lifetime that makes you Einstein?"
My friend: *rolls eyes* and says, "Whatever."
Me: "Keep on rolling them; you might find your brain in there."
Don't make a person look a fool when you are the real one!
You are so intelligent that parents come running to beg you to be their child!
Someone handed me a knife the other day and told me that it was very smart. I made sure it didn't outsmart me.
How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.
Hi, I'm stupid!
When is the only time Kamala Harris is using her head? When she is giving head.
My boyfriend entered a retarded contest, but they said no because they don’t allow perfectionists.
One reason I like to tell riddles is because they help with critical thinking skills.
Look behind you, there is Stephen Hawking.
Nobody.
Your mom is so old, she walked into an antique store and they kept her.
Your mom is so dumb, she called me asking for my phone #.
Yo Mama so dumb, she needs 10 explanation bears to understand you.
Your mum is so stupid, when she went on your phone it got fat.
Yo Mama so stupid that when she saw a sign that said, “Airport Left,” she turned around and went home.
The smartest kid in my class says "is-land" instead of "island."
When the C.I.A. raided Osama Bin Laden’s house, they found Steam on his computer. This means he was a gamer. He raged a little too hard and went for New York.
How do you get a blonde to drown?
Stick a mirror at the bottom of a pool.
When they were going around giving out brains and you thought they were saying "train," so you said, "No thanks, I’ll take the next one!" 🤣
When you were late to school and your teacher called you tardy, she meant that in more ways than one.