Insult jokes
You're so ugly, even the Twin Towers got a better upgrade than you!
Hey Siri, what’s in my bank account?
You stupid shit, piece of elephant crap, you’re so ugly that when you were born, your nickname was bastard! You’re so ugly, that your crush fainted in front of you and was proclaimed dead! You’re so ugly that-
(Destroys phone cutely)
Spy: Hahaha.
Me: What?
Spy: Time to pick up your mother.
Me: Oh no....
Wanna hear a joke? You thick.
Din mor ligner en banan. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Yo mama so ugly, when she entered the scare factory, she came out with a job application.
Your d*** size...
Is your middle name Fancy Feast?
'Cause your face looks like a can of dog food.
Joe Mama!
Boi, you can't be talking because if someone punched you in the face, you will be the one to apologize.
Your mom dot com.
Jack is a loser and a gaybo and a trans and a fanny face.
What do you call your retard friend?
A homie with an extra cromie.
Anybody can use this :)
Slow and steady wins the race, but it won't fix your ugly face. 😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣
Your mom is the biggest tosser on the planet, yeah, you heard right.
I don't have to strain myself a blood vessel and be wankin' solo anymore; she saved me a whole load of arthritis.
Your mom was absolutely getting drilled by me on the living room floor last night.
I said, "Are you half left or half right?"
"Neither! In-between."
"What?! In between your mom's tits when you go to sleep with her at night?"
The teacher was asking some of her students the meanings of words.
"Sally, can you tell me what 'beautiful' means?"
Sally: "You..."
Teacher: "Aww! How nice! But next time, say the actual definition. Now, can someone tell me what 'malicious' means?"
Andrew: "A dangerous person and/or virus."
Teacher: "Great job, Andrew! Now, what does 'fat' mean? Johnny?"
Johnny: "A pig."
Teacher: "Could you tell me the actual defini- "
Johnny: "In other words, the person who last spoke to me!"
Your mum gay, lol.
What’s another name for a cow?
You... cause you're fat.