INS jokes
What is a box called when a cough dies in it?
A coffin.
Here in Canada, you used to be able to be shipped off to an asylum just because you were gay.
I guess they couldn't tell the fruits from the nuts.
What do you call a retard in the military?
Special forces.
I don’t like to play games, actually. There is one game: It’s Barbie. Of course, I’ll be Ken, and you’ll be the box cum in.
Yo mama so fat that when she went in the ocean, Spain claimed her for new land.
Why can’t girls in the Middle East smoke weed?
Because they’ll get stoned.
What do an Apple and an Emo have in common?
They hang from trees.
America: Saying, "I beg your pardon" in British English is like saying; "What did you say to me you orphaned big forehead shitty ass small dick bitch?"
UK: You Americans are so fucking rude.
America: Oh, I'm SoRrY mIsTeR fAnCy PaNts 👖
What would the world be like without women?
A pain in the ass.
Where did Joe go after getting lost in a minefield?
Everywhere.
What's rap boats got in common with plastic bags? They both a danger to young children.
What's WWE called in Africa?
Shadow fight.
How do you keep an idiot in suspense?
I'll tell you tomorrow!
Flat girls be like, "I will have breasts in the future." This is to all the flat girls: you will never get it.
What does a middle aged man live in?
A retarded kid he keeps in the van.
What is white, blue eyed, blonde haired and somehow was made in Galilee during the Roman occupation?
An Italian Renaissance painting that was carbon dated.
Why did the rapper always carry a pencil?
In case he had to draw a crowd.
Why did the serial killer let the guy in a wheelchair go? Because the guy didn’t really have any body for the serial killer to stab.
This is why they don't want to sell the Double Manhattan in pubs anymore.
What do tofu and a dildo have in common? They are both meat substitutes.