INS jokes
Marriage is really educational.
When I was single, I didn't even know there was a wrong way to put a fork in the dishwasher.
I will remember my brother's last words: if you can't put a fork in a toaster, how about a spoon?
Do you like tree jokes? Because they leaf me in tears! :3
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair going through a fire? Ghost Rider.
Why did the rapper always carry a pencil?
In case he had to draw a crowd.
Why did the strawberry cry?
Her mom was in a jam.
Jack and Rose went on a cruise to do it in the water.
Jack seldom wore a condom, and now they have a daughter.
An orphan walked up to a baseball field, but a security guard said he couldn't come in because it was a home game.
Oh my Prince, I've loved you ever since the day we met.
When I was caught in your net of love, sweet love... It's all above...
Me in 2078 when the COVID-19 delta alpha theta beta cya layta alligayta nlgga chungus sussy deef clussy sussy bussy cunnybrap variant comes out and I need to stay in lockdown for another 2 years with my new mandated virus stopper buttplug 9000.
Little Johnny's neighbor just had a baby. He got invited to dinner with his neighbor. Little Johnny's dad said if he mentioned "ears" he will get a spank.
So Johnny looked in the bassinet. They were talking about the new baby. Johnny's mum said, "What beautiful eyes."
"That is great," said little Johnny, "because he will be stuffed if he needed glasses."
What do royals and hot dogs have in common?
They're usually in bread.
What do gasses and asses have in common? They both have asses in them!
What do a man and a blonde do in bed?
Sleep!
Putting WiFi in the morgue to enable live streaming.
Why can’t you private text someone in a community?
Because a community has more than two people.
What does B.I.B.L.E stand for?
Bullshit In Book Lacking Evidence.
At one point in your life, you were exactly pi years old.
There was a fire at my high school when I was in Year 7.
When the local newspaper interviewed my teacher, they asked her how she was seeing the "bright side" of it.
She said, "Well, at least our new students got a warm welcome!"
54 students died that day.
My teacher asks all of us in class, "What is your favorite thing in the world?"
Josh: Cookies.
Jacob: My parents.
Erika: My Friends!
Brody: Lamborghinis.
Me: Pulling over in a car in the middle of nowhere at night with my girlfriend and getting in the back seat where the magic happens... ;-)
My Teacher: Ok, everyone that was all good...WAIT A DANG SECOND!
*Everyone Looks at Me With A Weird Face....