INS jokes
A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal.
Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."
Person 1: “Hey, today was great!”
Person 2: “What happened?”
Person 1: “I ran into my ex today.”
Person 2: “What’s so great about that?”
Person 1: “I was in my car.”
What is a definition of tight?
A. Putting a blind man in a round room and saying, "Your dinner's in the corner."
When you are chilling in the World Trade Center, and then you suddenly get airplane WiFi.
Roblox jokes on this page in a nutshell: something about Roblox girlfriends, and "Add me on Roblox. My name is Sonicboy100299easyarsenaltowerofhellproxdlol."
Who were the fastest runners ever? Adam and Eve. They were first in the human race.
What do rocks and girls have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
What grade is the worst, like if in elementary?
I hate it when people say to suck it up... I mean, sometimes I don’t want someone’s dick in my face.
Why is mercury like everything else in the world?
Because it gives you cancer.
What do orphans and apples have in common?
Only one gets picked.
What do birds and children have in common?
If you shoot them, they die.
Joe: What do the Leafs and the Titanic have in common?
Ben: I don't know.
Joe: They both look good until they hit the ice.
Little Jonny Bad Ass was sitting on a porch one day, and a preacher was in the house. Little Jonny Bad Ass had to use the bathroom, so he bangs on the door saying, "Mom, I have to use the bathroom!" His mom says wait. So Little Jonny Bad Ass saw a hat on the step. He looks around, pulls his pants down, and shits in the hat.
A few later, the preacher comes out and says, "I see you have my hat!" Little Jonny Bad Ass says, "Yeah, I caught the world's fastest bird!" The preacher says, "Well, let me see him!" Little Jonny Bad Ass says, "No, I don't know." Well, the preacher says, "I'll put my hands by the hat, you lift, and I'll catch him!" Little Jonny Bad Ass lifted the hat and the preacher clapped his hands, and Little Jonny Bad Ass says, "Now see the bird don't shit," and ran.
Why don't Chinese children believe in Santa?
Because they're the ones making the toys.
Say, Aiden, are you and Gwen dating? Oooo, you and her sitting in a tree, K.I.S.S.I.N.G., then comes the romance, then comes engagement, then comes the wedding, and then the baby! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Then comes cheating and arguments, and then D.I.V.O.R.C.E.!!!!!!!!!!!!
Aiden + Gwen = Husband and wife! HAHAHAHAHAHA!
Girlfriend and boyfriend!!!!!!!!
Yo mama's so stupid, when they said, "Order in the court," she asked for burgers and fries.
I must have raped a woman in a skip. She said she felt rubbish.
In Antarctica, there are ice dicks for ladies to hop onto.
Little do they know I've been waiting for this moment.
What do a bullet and a police officer have in common?
When a bullet kills someone, it gets fired.