Im jokes
Dad: Are you gay?
Kid: Yes.
10 days later.
Kid: I’m going to my girlfriend's house.
Dad: I thought you were gay?
Kid: What’s wrong with you? He’s the girly girl of our relationship, dumba**.
Dad: Don’t swear and okay, bud.
My birthday's on September 11th, I'm gonna turn the fuck up and throw a banger! Then rub my tits in birthday cake frosting!!! WOOOOOOOOO!
I was excited to watch Fast and Furious because of Dom Toretto, then I realized family is nothing to me 'cause I'm an orphan.
I don't struggle with depression, I'm used to it.
I'm gonna blow out your lungs faster than Joe Biden thinks is possible with a 9mm.
If I'm ugly, at least I'm not you.
Jeffy: "Daddy, Daddy, a monster said it’s gonna poop in your hat!"
Marvin: "I don’t believe that."
Jeffy: "But he said, 'Jeffy, I’m gonna poop in your Daddy’s hat!'"
The next morning,
Jeffy: "Daddy, a monster pooped in your hat!"
*Marvin/Mario looks in his hat*
Marvin: "Jeffy, I don’t believe you, you pooped in my hat!"
Slade must be WiFi... because I’m not feeling a CONNECTION.
Deku: Hey Todoroki, are you done with your Halloween costume?
Todoroki: Yes. *comes out in a macaroni outfit*
Deku: Wha- I'm todoroni.
Bakugo: OMFG, I'm out! *blows up UA*
I was going to make a 9/11 joke, but I'm afraid it will crash and burn.
I'm afraid for my gay calendar. Its days are numbered!
Leave a like if you LOL at this joke!
Roses are red, violets are blue.
My heart is dead.
I’m such a fool.
Why did I fall for you?
I know this is supposed to be an emo joke, but does anyone want to play Rocket League?
I'm on PS4, by the way!
My name: Box3d_by_Clapped
I’m gonna kick some gum and chew some ass... but I’m all out of ass.
Son: Dad, I know I'm adopted.
Dad: Well, how do you know?
Son: I found the adoption papers.
Dad: That is for your mum.
If you know, you know.
Y'uree: Bruh... listen... gangbang... sex... the same.
Halyei: Hello Y'uree and Jarod. How are you guys today?
Y'uree: Well, sexy girls like you should be ass-fucked or fucked so hard that all you can do is talk or nothing at all?
Halyei: Thank you, I suck dicks too!
Jarod: Are you Breya???
Halyei: No... do I look like that flying bastard???
Jarod: Ugh... no... baby, you're free to go!
Halyei: Sorry, I miss cursing and having sex with her too! Sorry for being an idiot. I really miss her. Maybe you and I can give her a threesome??? No, I'm not gay! WHY!!!!!!! Can you come to the please fuck me! It's the fuckable girls contest and I want to win! Sorry!
What did the mayonnaise say when the refrigerator door was opened? Close the door, I'm dressing.
This guy is boiling water. The girl walks in and says, “What are you doing?” The guy says, “I’m making Holy Water.” She said, “How?” He said, “I’m boiling the hell out of it.”
"Where exactly are you taking me, doctor?"
"To the morgue."
"What? But I’m not dead yet!"
"And we’re not there yet."
I'm as straight as a rainbow.