Im jokes

Hi guys, I'm back! So I have a question for you. What is red and smells like blue paint? Type in comments what you came up with.

C'mon guys, I know I'm not the only bored one around here!

I'm bored. Someone wanna chat?

1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!

My chocolate babe is calling my name, and now I'm about to get my chocolate freak on.

Mom: I'm going to the shop. If someone is at the door, don't open it.

Me: Ok.

*Ring*

Me: Opens the door.

Oh sh*t!

Mom: Gets flip flop.

I was walking home, then I saw a "Wait" sign. A man came and took me. I'm still waiting for him to ask for a lesson.

What did the pig say when he was in the sun?

I'm bacon.

A teacher says to her class one day, "Whoever answers my next question can go home."

A boy throws his bag out the window.

The teacher asks, "Who just threw that?"

The boy says, "Me! I’m going home now."

Well, I didn’t get as high as I wanted to, but I’m high enough that if I fall I’d probably break something.

This guy goes to the doctor and says, “I think I’m a wigwam, no, I think I’m a teepee, no, I must be a wigwam, no, a teepee.”

The doctor tells him, “I think I understand your problem. You’re two tents.”

I work at a tire shop.

I'm pretty tired.

Who are voting for this election? I'm voting for Tricity, so vote for Tricity. Electricity!

The QUEEN is JACK! KING off the JOKER!

I know what you're thinking, pervert. Actually, the joke's about a jester in drag. OK, I’m joking, the Queen cheated on the King with the Jester.

Wanna hear a construction joke?

Nah, I'm still working on it.

What's the difference between a dead hooker and an onion?

I don't cry when I'm cutting up a dead hooker.

What did the Queen Bee of Destiny's Child say?

"I'm so crazy in love..."

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Who.

Who who?

Who who, I'm an owl.

You can get the park in the park with you if I have park in your car, and I will be there in a couple of hours. Would you be able to pick them out at your house, and I will pick you up, and I will be at your place at your convenience. I can get them in a little while. I’m at the park. Bye.

Stop with the emojis. They kinda just make the joke cringy. For example: How many ppl 🤷🤷🤷🤷🤷🤷🤷🤷 does it take to have 🥒🍑🍑🍑🍑🍑???? Well, it takes at least 1 🤷 and 1 👰 and they make a perfect ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤. See how cringy it is. I mean sure, it's a dumb example, but still, just at least less emojis.