Identity jokes

What do you call a person with no arms or legs at your front door? Mat.

Straight people ask why gays have such a good fashion sense.

They have to come out of the closet sometime.

What's a benefit of being an orphan?

No one makes yo mama jokes to you.

I was on the train today and saw a cow on it.

It was quite strange until I realized it was Alfie's mum.

How are you and an orphan similar?

Both of your fathers are invisible.

Me: Hey, are you an orphan?

Orphan: Yeah, what gave me away?

Me: Your parents.

What do you call a homosexual wrestler?

Gay Mysterio.

Why did Severus Snape cross the road wearing an invisibility cloak?

So no one would know what side he was on.

What's the LGBTQ+'s favorite cereal?

Fruity Pebbles.

I hope you remembered my name since you’ll be screaming it later.

What is another word for a bagel? 🥯

Jewish doughnut ✡️ 🍩👏 👏 👍 👍 👌 👌 💪 💪 😋 🏆 🎖

What do you call a deaf and blind axe murderer?

Helen Killer.

A conman, a mentally handicapped person, and a Russian spy walk into a bar.

And the bartender asks, "What will it be, Mr. President?"

Why are most vacuums gay?

They’re always coming out of the closet.

What do you call five Black people having sex?

Threesome.

If you are what you eat,

why is Jeffrey Dahmer white?

Son: Dad, I have black skin and you have white skin, are you sure you're my parents?

Dad: Oh... well I never thought it would come to this, or to your head that you were kidnapped...

Son: Am I kidnapped?

Dad: Well, you're adopted, and if you want to see your biological parents, they’ll be waiting for you in heaven.

If I had a dollar for every gender, I would have 2 dollars and a bunch of counterfeits.

This bunny named Mason came up to a bar and ordered a beer and a burger. He sits at a table and the waiter brought a huge burger.

Mason: "Heh. Good thing I eat like a horse." He looks up at the waiter.

Waiter: "You are a nasty little bunny, aren't you?"

Mason screamed and ran away as the waiter chased him... she was a HORSE.

I was walking down the street when I saw my ex-girlfriend, so I fucked her. Turns out it was her identical twins that she never told me about.

And I decided to confront her. So I did the next time I saw her, but this time it was her identical triplet. There are 3 of them...

AND SHE NEVER BROUGHT THAT UP IN THE 7 YEARS I WAS DATING HER!