Keep the planet clean. It's not Uranus.
Hygiene Jokes
I told my therapist you are too fat and ugly to date grown men. Then she asked me, "You wanna give a judgemental reaction about that?" I said, "Okay, you smell rat pee on somebody's cock."
Why would you not let an elephant sleep in the same bed with you?
Because they stink and now the room smells like elephant shit.
Why did you put your dirty ass feet in my grits without telling me all this?
Because I forgot to wash and dry them with a paper towel.
The other day all those toilet papers came by my house and asked do I have any crack candy. Naw, I don't have no damn crack candy or no crack apples. All I have here in the backyard is a peanut butter crack sandwich. Help yourself, and while you're at it, clean up all the damn doggie dodo that's everywhere. Thank you, Mr. Toilet Papers.
Where do rabbits take baths and wash their asses?
A: What's the difference between a toilet and a washing basin?
B: I don't know.
A: Then I guess your house looks beautiful...
B: ...
Yo mama is so poor, she makes her own hand sanitizer.
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
He wiped his ass.
Your momma's so nasty, she sucked your daddy's dick and kissed you good night!
"Number 15: Burger King foot lettuce. The last thing you want in your Burger King burger is someone's foot fungus, but as it turns out, that might be what you get."
"Look, Ma! I peed in the pool!"
My sister said you smell, but then she saw her panties having moles on it.
Did you know nine of ten dentists recommend oral sex?
Why didn’t the toilet paper cross the road?
'Cause there was a crack!
Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the road?
It got stuck in the crack.
Hey guys, I use toilet paper.
Up your pp with a piece of crap!
So, I took a poop outside. When I was done, I wiped and got it on my finger. After that, I had Nutella, and I thought the poop on my hand was Nutella, and I licked it. I said, "Daddy chill, what in the heck is this crap?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
What did the nose say to the finger?
"Stop picking me!"
