Hygiene jokes
So, some thieves robbed me the other day. They took everything I owned, except for the soap, towels, and deodorant.
Dirty bastards.
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
It didn't; it got stuck in a crack.
So this guy thought he was funny by pissing on the floor and not in the urinal.
Later on, I guess some kid ran into the bathroom because, well, he probably had to go, but yeah, he slipped and fell and hit his head on the urinal, so all in all it was a pretty good prank on his part.
What's worse than sucking a dozen raw oysters out of your grandmother's cunt?
Putting in 12 and sucking out 13.
A man with 20 dollars walked into Dave & Buster's. He went to the bathroom to wash his hands. He walked out without any clothes but still has his money.
When I get naked in the bathroom... the shower usually gets turned on!
Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road? Because it got stuck in a crack!
Why can't the toilet paper cross the road? Because it got stuck in a crack!
A good bath is like a dead lover.
You can enjoy them, that is until they get too cold.
Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road? It got stuck in a crack.
What did the pot say to the kettle?
"To lick the s*** spoon."
John took a bath with bubbles.
Bubbles was a man.
Is it just me, or when you wipe your ass too deep, it reminds you of your uncle? Just me?
Mikey don't clean his foreskin dude straight gay.
What do you do after you eat the softest pussy in the world?
Put the diapers back on.
Confucius say, "man who go to sleep with itchy bum, wake up with smelly finger."
Why is there no open hunting season on hippies?
Have you ever tried to clean one?
What's the difference between a hippie chick and a hockey player? The hockey player showers after 3 periods.
Why was the homeless lady only wearing one sock?
She started her period.
Yo mama is so nasty, she buys sex toys at the second-hand shop.