Humor

Humor

Orphan

    • What is the difference between an orphan and a blind kid?

    They both can’t see their parents. 😂😂😂😂😂

    TikTok

    • Me: "Comment if you love yourself and give me a reason."

    Friends: comments give reason.

    Me: "Notice how I commented nothing."

    Day later:

    Mom: Let me see your TikTok.

    Me: Shows her the video.

    Mom: calls suicide.

    JK, she just beat me for posting a video on her.

    Potato

    • If I eat a poisonous potato, it attacks my immune system and I die.

    But if I poison a poisonous potato, then eat it, then I won't die because the potato is already dead and can't attack my immune system.

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    • Quote

    • Ruin a quote by attributing it to the wrong person.

    "Don't cry because it is over. Smile because it happened." -Adolf Hitler, 1945.

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    • Humor memes

    Emo

    • - The emo went to give the tree a high five, but the emo was left hanging.

    - How did the gay person die? Homicide.

    - Why did the emo get kicked out of the amusement park? He was cutting in line.

    - When does a joke turn into a dad joke? When it leaves and never comes back.

    - I cried when my dad chopped onions. Onions was such a good dog.

    - I have happy memories building sandcastles with my dad, until my mom took his urn away.

    - How is the person over there different from cancer? His dad didn't beat cancer.

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    • Cock

    • One day, a priest loses his cock (chicken). He goes to the church and says, "Who has seen a cock?" All the women raised their hands. "No, who has seen a cock that is not theirs?" Half the women's hands went up. "No, no, no, who has seen my cock?" All the nuns' hands went up.

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    • Sauce

    • What happens when you make an asían girl squirt?

    She charges you 10 cents for extra sauce.

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    • Blowjob

    • Son: Dad, do you remember your first blowjob?

    Dad: Ohhh yeah, I do!

    Son: How did it taste?

    Dad: Get out.

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    • Body Count

    • A man is with his friend in a bar.

    The friend, out of the blue, asks, "Hey, what's your body count?"

    Nervous, the man looks away.

    The friend then says, "I'm talking about sex."

    The man then turns back and mumbles, "Oh... I thought you saw inside the basement..."

    "Wait, wha..."

    "What?"

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    • Kid

    • "Oh daddy," the kid said. "I love you so much!"

    "Hey," the man responded. "Until we get the DNA test results, I'm just Harry to you!"

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