Humor
What’s faster than a black guy with the TV?
His little brother with the console.
What’s Forrest Gump’s password? 1forrest1.
Someone complimented my parking today! They left a sweet note on my windshield that said, “Parking fine.”
Why can’t orphans have phones?
Because it has a home button!
What does an Asian say when his car tires burst on the highway?
"Some Ting Wheely Wong!"
Memes
I used to date this girl only to find out she's a guy.
I guess you can say she had me in a trans.
You’re so fine that my zipper is falling for you.
Why did the dick go insane?
Someone kept messing with his head.
What did God say when he made the first woman?
"Where is your dick at?"
What do you call a Mexican with one leg?
Border hopper.
What was the comment that Vice President Harris said in the United States Senate when a blue dog democrat in the United States Senate called Vice President Harris a bitch?
Kibbles 'N Bits!! Kibbles 'N Bits!! I is going to get me some Kibbles 'N Bits!!
What do you call it when a gay guy eats Cheerios?
Fruit Loops.
Is it OK to tell a Covid patient to stay positive?
When someone calls me ugly, I get sad and hug them.
I know life can be difficult for those with weak vision.
Hear the one about the deaf kid?
He didn't.
Q: What do you get when you cross Raggedy Ann with the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
A: A red-headed bitch with a yeast infection.
Me: Hi Jacob!
Jacob: Hi.
Me: Your parents went to jail for littering when you were born!
Jacob: GOO GOO GAH GAH
What do you call an Asian that was born too early?
Wong Tai Ming.
When you tell an Asian kid it’s raining cats and dogs and he’s like, “Just open your mouth and close your eyes!”
Dr. Seuss dark jokes.
Hey there little mister, I'm dating your sister!