Stephen Hawking’s death was purely accidental. He clicked “shut-down” instead of “sleep”.
A man walks into a bar, he takes a seat and asks the barmen if he wanted to hear a blonde joke, the barmen replies before you tell this joke I want to tell you something, see the women over there, she is a black belt in karate, she's blonde , see the bouncer over there he is also a blonde, see the chick over there with that pool que she is also blonde, also I have a shotgun behind the bar i'm blonde, so do you still want to tell your joke? He replies f**k that I ain't explaining the joke 4 times.
A brother and a sister always got into fights. One day the brother tells the sister, "your adopted" the sister yells back, "At least they wanted me!"
Do gay midgets come out of the cabinet?
A guy walks into a bar with a revolver and yells, “WHO THE F*** F***ED MY WIFE!” A man in the back responds, “YOU AINT GOT ENOUGH BULLETS MATE!”
How do you get an emo out of a tree?
Cut the rope.
Dark humor jokes about orphans are funny bc no parents are gonna be told
"Knock knock." Orphan: "Who's there?" "Not your parents."
Why can a gay man give a better brojob to a heterosexual man better than another heterosexual man? experience
What do u call a blind dinosaur? *do-u-think-he-saur-us*
What do you call a man off the ground? Hanged.
Yes I’m CUTE
C-ringe U-gly T-errible E-mpty
Why is the leaning tower of Pizza leaning?
It has better reflexes than the twin towers.
How are school shooting victims and school shooting jokes similar?
They never get old.
I'm starting to wish my grass was emo. Why? So it would cut itself.
Fatty and skinny were in a bed. Fatty rolled over and skinny was dead.
What’s the difference between my lawn and my wrists? Nothing, I cut both of them
My life
Tell me when you get it
There's a movie about constipation. It hasn't come out yet.
There was a guy who got his entire left side cut off. Don’t worry, he is all right now.
