Have you ever tried eating a clock? It's really time-consuming, especially if you go for seconds.
Kid: "Hey dad, what's dark humor?"
Dad: "Go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him."
Kid: "But dad, I don't have any legs or arms."
Dad: "Exactly, son."
Well, I'm off to the orphanage to tell "yo mama" jokes.
What did the twin towers mom say when she fed them, open wide honey here comes the air plane
why do dwarfs laugh when they run. the grass tickles their balls.
My girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile. That's a big word for a seven year old.
When you send her a dick pic but then she sends you one right back...
what do you call an Asian receptionist?
Tai ping
How are school shooting victims and school shooting jokes similar?
They never get old.
What is the difference between a rapist and a dictionary? One of them knows the definition of no.
I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes. The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box.
Stephen Hawking’s death was purely accidental. He clicked “shut-down” instead of “sleep”.
Whats starts with M and end with arriage?
Miscarriage Now we all know that joke never gets old, and you know what?
Neither does the child
Asian pregnancy test: Stick a Rubik cube into vagina. Wait 30 seconds, if it's solved then there's a little Asian in there.
A brother and a sister always got into fights. One day the brother tells the sister, "your adopted" the sister yells back, "At least they wanted me!"
How do you get an emo out of a tree?
Cut the rope.
"Knock knock." Orphan: "Who's there?" "Not your parents."
What do you call a man off the ground? Hanged.
best friend makes 9/11 joke
you: hey my dad was inside the tower
best friend: im sorry
you: I always knew he was a great pilot
A guy walks into a bar with a revolver and yells, “WHO THE F*** F***ED MY WIFE!” A man in the back responds, “YOU AINT GOT ENOUGH BULLETS MATE!”
