- Yo mama is so fat, when she wears a yellow dress, people yell "Taxi!"

- Yo mama is so stupid, she tried to climb Mountain Dew.

- Yo mama is so ugly, she made a blind kid cry.

- Yo mama is so old, she knew Burger King when he was still a prince.

- Yo mama is so poor, she can't even afford to pay attention.

(Best pick-up line ever). Your body is like 9/11. I wanna crash into your twin towers. 😏

Male Patient: So, I just pull my pants down and bend over for this prostate exam?

Doctor: Yep.

Male Patient: Ok, I'm ready. Hey! That doesn't feel like a finger.

Doctor: Yep, and I'm not even a doctor.

White girl: So this crystal cures my depression and helps me lose weight?

Me holding a rock of meth: YES!!!

Why did the Indian man refuse to use deodorant? Because he wanted to smell like his natural habitat, the shitter.

[Them]: "Don't you think you'll feel ashamed of all the suicide jokes you've made when you get older?"

[Me]: "When I what?" 0-0

What did the sex offender frog say to the other sex offender frog when a hot frog passed them?

Rrrrrapeit!

My grandmother made her passage on a boat. The thing wasn’t the only thing that went down.

Me: Hey Siri, did you know Candice died?

Siri: Yes, I was informed she died from sugondese.

Me: What is that?

Siri: Sugondese nuts.