Humor
Why were Helen Keller's hands crippled?
From reading stop signs at fifty miles per hour.
What’s the difference between a pimple and a Priest?
You see, a pimple wouldn’t normally come on a kid until he’s 13 years old.
Why wouldn’t Mr. Bee 🐝 push Ms. Bee 🐝 away?
Because he loves his honey.
Q. What do Kenny's dick and this joke have in common?
A. They're both really short.
Why did Ms. Grapes 🍇 want to marry Mr. Grapes 🍇?
Because she loves raisin kids.
Why does Ms. Mushroom 🍄 go out with Mr. Mushroom 🍄?
Because he’s a fungi.
What did the girl say to the man with a moustache?
I moustache you a question.
So the horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?"
UwU
How do we know that the ocean is friendly? It waves.
Knock knock. Who’s there? Tank. Tank who? You're welcome. Hehehehe😛😛😛
Why can’t the employee tell dirty laundry jokes?
Because they always come out clean.
Why did the skunk 🦨 sleep 💤 under a car?
Because he wanted to wake up oily.
A man once ate the left side of a person. One guy watching asked if the guy he was eating was okay. The man eating him said, "No... it's okay, he's all right now."
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have pockets. I’m
The teacher asked her student to say the alphabet. The student recited the alphabet: "abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz". "Where's the p?" He looked down to the floor and said: "it's running down my legs".
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Ididap.
Ididap who?
That's the joke, you did a poo!
Have you ever stepped in Stephen Hawking's house?
Neither has he. 😂😂
What did the left butt cheek say to the right?
"Trump 2020."
Why don’t mountains take things seriously?
Because they’re hill areas.
Why are tomatoes 🍅 the slowest vegetable?
Because they can’t ketchup.