Humor
What does the cross guard say to the cows crossing the road?
Mooooooooooo along!
Did you know the "f" in "orphan" stands for family because there is no "f" in orphan.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because he wanted to get to the other side. LOL.
"It never gets old."
"Just like a sick kid!"
What is one plus one?
It's TOO hard!
This is a joke to tell to someone with you or something. SOMEONE will laugh. Say: "This word isn't gonna be funny until I tell you, your probably not going to laugh." *your friend* "what's the word?" *you* "finger" *friend* *dies of laughter*. *note* it works better if you wiggle your finger or something before and not everyone laughs, so don't feel bad if they don't. Also, don't be surprised if you get put in jail for murder, because you're going to kill someone with this.
I am dark humor.
Did you know Yao Ming has the biggest penis in Chinese history? It measured in at nearly 5 inches!
Your (DYM 17).
It's only okay to beat up a dwarf when they walk up to your wife and say, "Your hair smells nice."
Sad life goes, joke mom.
Why is the leaning tower of Pizza leaning?
It has better reflexes than the twin towers.
The popular girl told me, "I bet your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory!"
Two weeks later, she shows up pregnant.
...
I guess her rubber broke too.
I would tell you a joke about 9/11, but it would come crashing down on you.
Why is death taken so lightly? It's terrible how people use it! (This is NOT a joke!)
Who wants to laugh about life with me?
I got kicked out of a hospital once. I told all the COVID patients to stay positive.
Read this slow: I 1 2 4 Q?
Broke my toenail yesterday. I'm now presenting you puns/jokes:
1. "Yeah, I broke my toenail, wanna see phoTOES?" 2. "I'm tired of bandaging my toe! Oh. My. GAUZE."
I find that a lot of butts CRACK me up.