Humor
Did you know Yao Ming has the biggest penis in Chinese history? It measured in at nearly 5 inches!
Your (DYM 17).
It's only okay to beat up a dwarf when they walk up to your wife and say, "Your hair smells nice."
Sad life goes, joke mom.
Why is the leaning tower of Pizza leaning?
It has better reflexes than the twin towers.
The popular girl told me, "I bet your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory!"
Two weeks later, she shows up pregnant.
...
I guess her rubber broke too.
I would tell you a joke about 9/11, but it would come crashing down on you.
Why is death taken so lightly? It's terrible how people use it! (This is NOT a joke!)
Who wants to laugh about life with me?
I got kicked out of a hospital once. I told all the COVID patients to stay positive.
Read this slow: I 1 2 4 Q?
Broke my toenail yesterday. I'm now presenting you puns/jokes:
1. "Yeah, I broke my toenail, wanna see phoTOES?" 2. "I'm tired of bandaging my toe! Oh. My. GAUZE."
I find that a lot of butts CRACK me up.
If you have 13 apples in one hand and 10 oranges in the other, what do you have?
Big hands.
"Sir, we're mining too many useless mineral ores."
Hitler: "Mine less, then."
Grammar Nazi bursts in: "MINE FEWER!"
Hitler looks over: "Yes?"
What do you call a fly with no wings?
A walk.
What does a cannibal and a spider have in common?
Both have eight legs.
Gwen?!?!??!/1??!?!??!
Why'd the chicken cross the road?
A: To get to the gay (guys/girls) house.
(Wait awhile) then ask “knock knock?” Other person says “Who’s there?”
A: The chicken.
What's the difference between an American school and a shooting range?
My dick doesn't get hard at the shooting range.