Hows jokes
Yo forehead so big that when I asked Vegeta how big it is, he said “IT’S OVER 9000!”
Q: How do you catch a squirrel?
A: Act like a nut.
(Psst! Heard this joke before? Sorry! That's the only nut-and-squirrel joke I know.)
How does NASA fart?
They fart with their ass-teroids.
Sure, just tell me how to put on a mask.
OK, so Kenya and Kariah are both orphans that hate orphan jokes, so how about we make a joke out of them!
Q: Ten shepherds out in the sheep field. How do you know which one's gay?
A: He's the one the sheep fuck!
(I'm gay, and I know this joke is demeaning and inappropriate, but I still think it's funny as a 2-inch penis.)
Mississippi is a long word. How do you spell it?
On a scale of 8 to 10, how good do I look?
How to write a joke?
After the holidays, Ron asks Hermione: "How was the weather in Spain?"
Hermione: "No idea, it was so foggy I couldn't see a thing!"
How do bees get to school?
They take the buzz.
A neighbor went up to me and asked me where my parents were. When I said, "In the bed," my neighbor said, "Oooooohh, how long is the penis?" I said, "Wait here," and I interrupted my parents while they were doing some "business" and asked my dad the exact question he said. Then he spanked me.
How do make an adult cry?
Stab him 10000 times until the floors are red with human blood.
How do you rape someone? By forcing them to do it with you! Please comment! Bad or good! :)
How do you plan a party in outer space?
You planet.
Puerto Rican teen: I'm a waste, a failure, NUNCA LO PODRA ASER (I'll never be able to do it).
The mother: AI NINO (OH CHILD).
The teen: QUE? (WHAT?)
The mother: NO TE PONGA CON ESTA MIELDA OTRAVES! (DON'T START WITH THIS SHIT AGAIN!)
The teen: I CAN'T DO SHIT RIGHT MAMA!
The mother: OOOHHH YEAH WELL TU SI PUEDES ABLAR MIELDA DE TI, I BOTAR BASURA! (YOU SURE CAN TALK CRAP ABOUT YOURSELF AND THROW OUT THE TRASH.)
The teen: QUAL (WHICH).
The mother: MADRE DE DIOS (MOTHER OF GOD).
The teen: AVIA UNA NEGRA I OTRA BLANKA (THERE WAS A BLACK ONE AND WHITE ONE).
*A phone buzzes.*
The teen: Whose phone is that, ma?
Unknown: MR. PRESIDENT IF YOU TAKE AWAY THE CONFEDERATE FLAG HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHO THE BAD WHITE PEOPLE ARE?
*Runs to bag, opens white one and sticks hand in.*
The teen: HAIR GEL
How does a rapper clean his house?
With a LIL' SCRUB.
How do rappers like their pizza?
With extra bars and dough!
How do people get skinny?
Their parents don't feed them. (JOKE)
How do Mexicans begin counting?
Juan, Two, Three.