How To jokes
Hey, I’m George, and this is how to figure out if someone is a psychopath.
Go into someone’s search history, and find “Cuphead ship fanfic”.
Hey George, why do you have Russia x America countryhumans?
Hey, you there, were you raised on a chicken farm? 'Cause you really know how to raise a cock!
Guy: Do you know how to draw women's rights?
Girl: No, how?
Guy: All you need is a blank paper, and that's it.
I love teaching students
how to make them harm themselves.
How do you know if you're making a Caesar salad? Stabbing it 23 times.
How to get into politics?
Fail art school.
Has anybody noticed that the New York City football team is the New York Jets? They sure know how to scare the Twin Towers.
Are suicide bombers taught properly how to fly, or...
Are they just given a quick crash course?
Want to know how to fit 71 people in a car? Two in the front while we handle 69 in the back.
Why was Helen Keller truly an inspiration?
She learned how to read and write despite being from Alabama!
How to get rid of non-vaccinators: call water a "dehydration vaccine."
Bro never learned how to play Jenga. 🙄
I went to a book store yesterday and I saw a book that said "how to solve 50% of your problems." So I bought 2.
How to cure boredom:
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Asking for a friend, could anyone please tell me how to politely ask a question for a friend?
Why do people play basketball?
Because they want to learn how to suck balls.
I once saw a noose joke.
I wanna know how to make one :D
What is the only thing lesbians know how to grow? Cucumbers.
When your legs forget how to work after leg day, I can't climb the stairs.
Michael Myers right behind me. Runs like I'm a track star!
When you're in a cage But it's not real!
Being in a cage But you have the key.
Being in a cage But nobody sees you.
Being outside of a cage, but it's empty.
Living and realizing you've been born into one.
Thinking someone cared about you But turns out they're toxic as fu**.
But you can't live without them.
The cage Is you. You have the key But you don't know how to use it.