Master

Master jokes

Dad

  • My dad was a master of his art; being compared to Houdini. Due to his skill in disappearing.

  • 4
  • Master bait

  • My brother wanted to go fishing. I told him he had to learn how to "master bait". Go look it up on YouTube. Guess who is grounded?

  • 2
  • Funeral

  • I got an Xbox achievement the other day. It said "Trash Master," and everyone looked at me at the funeral.

  • 0
  • Relish

  • To master puns, you got to relish them first. That's how I must(ar)d it. Who knows, maybe you will ketchup to my level.

  • 1
  • Porn star

  • What starts with "s" and ends with "erm"? SuperM.

    This means both "matrix" and "master" so take out the "u" and then you just get "master". When you think of sperm, you think of porn. If you're a master at something, you're also a star at it. So you get porn star.

  • 2
  • Teacher

  • A teacher asked a class who killed Goliath. The first pupil said he wasn’t the one. The second said he doesn’t know. No one knew in the class.

    The teacher got furious and dashed to the Head Master’s office to report. Immediately, the head master followed him back to the class with a cane. He growled- “If no one tells me who killed Goliath in this class, you will see fire!” Everyone in the class insisted on the fact that it wasn’t them.

    Then the Head master looked at the teacher and said- “Mr. Dapo, are you sure that the person who killed Goliath is in this class?” The teacher fainted.

  • 1
  • Coach

  • What do you call an older white man surrounded by young black men in the 1800s?

    Master.

    What do you call an older white man surrounded by young black men in the 2000s?

    Coach.

  • 0
  • Baiter

  • If you start at a bait shop, you're an amateur baiter, but once you achieve the highest level, you become a master baiter. Now buy a shrimp boat and become a master baiter on a shrimp boat.

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  • Furry

  • I diddled for a total of 67 times. I am the ultra Gooner. My cum is everywhere. I am the goon master.

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  • Friend

  • Friend: How dark is your humor?

    Me: .....it...

    Friend: No

    Me: *smiles* GETS BEAT BY THE MISTRESS AND GETS SCOLDED BY THE MASTER!!!

    Friend: Why are you like this?

  • 0