Holiday jokes
Santa gives a boy a bike and a soccer ball for Christmas. This upsets the boy. Why?
Answer: He has no legs. The boy has no legs.
Why do orphans only have 362 days in a year?
Because they don't have Mothers', Fathers', and Family Day!
Halloween. The day we celebrate your face.
I wanna be a Christmas decoration cause they always do be hanging.
How did Santa fit down the chimney?
He buttered it.
What do people get for Christmas when they behave badly? They get coal. Why coal, you're probably saying, because the true meaning is cucks of all kinds.
Me: How do you celebrate Christmas?
Orphan: I don't know what you mean.
Me: There is no one to give a present.
Moms have Mother's Day and dads have Father's Day. What do single guys have?
Palm Sunday.
"What do you call a person who is afraid of Santa Claus?"
"Claustrophobic!"
Why does an orphan’s calendar only have 363 days?
There are no Father’s or Mother’s Days on their calendar.
Americans won't have a Thanksgiving Dinner this year. Why not? They sent their turkey to the White House.
Why do orphans go on holiday?
To see what family is like.
You are so ugly Santa goes "ho ho ho holy sh*t."
What does an orphan get for Christmas? Hypothermia.
What is Labor Day? That’s when mommies have their babes.
What do orphans get on Xmas?
Lonely.
What did the kid with no arms get for Christmas?
A pair of gloves!
Nah, I’m not that mean, he’s still trying to open his presents.
Where do math teachers go on vacation? Times Square.
What is the true meaning of Christmas?
Stealing presents from orphans - a quote by Technoblade.
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?
Friend: Why?
Me: Because they don't have a mother or father's day.