New Holiday Jokes

[Verse 1] On the first day of Rizzmas, My Diddy gave to me A Lunchly from MrBeast.

[Verse 2] On the second day of Rizzmas, My Diddy gave to me Two Hawk Tuahs And a Lunchly from MrBeast.

[Verse 3] On the third day of Rizzmas, My Diddy gave to me Three fine shyts Two Hawk Tuahs And a Lunchly from MrBeast.

[Verse 4] On the fourth day of Rizzmas, My Diddy gave to me Four feining feins Three fine shyts Two Hawk Tuahs And a Lunchly from MrBeast.

[Verse 5] On the fifth day of Rizzmas, My Diddy gave to me Five skibidis Four feining feins Three fine shyts Two Hawk Tuahs And a Lunchly from MrBeast.

[Verse 6] On the sixth day of Rizzmas, My Diddy gave to me Six glizzys glazing Five skibidis Four feining feins Three fine shyts Two Hawk Tuahs And a Lunchly from MrBeast.

[Verse 7] On the seventh day of Rizzmas, My Diddy gave to me Seven simps a simping Six glizzys glazing Five skibidis Four feining fеins Three fine shyts Two Hawk Tuahs And a Lunchly from MrBeast.

[Verse 8] On the eighth day of Rizzmas, My Diddy gave to me Eight edging sessions Seven simps a simping Six glizzys glazing Five skibidis Four feining feins Three fine shyts Two Hawk Tuahs And a Lunchly from MrBeast.

[Verse 9] On the ninth day of Rizzmas, My Diddy gave to me Nine moggers mogging Eight edging sessions Seven simps a simping Six glizzys glazing Five skibidis Four feining feins Three fine shyts Two Hawk Tuahs And a Lunchly from MrBeast.

[Verse 10] On the tenth day of Rizzmas, My Diddy gave to me Ten gyatts a shaking Nine moggers mogging Eight edging sessions Seven simps a simping Six glizzys glazing Five skibidis Four feining feins Three fine shyts Two Hawk Tuahs And a Lunchly from MrBeast.

[Verse 11] On the eleventh day of Rizzmas, My Diddy gave to me Eleven fanums taxing Ten gyatts a shaking Nine moggers mogging Eight edging sessions Seven simps a simping Six glizzys glazing Five skibidis Four feining feins Three fine shyts Two Hawk Tuahs And a Lunchly from MrBeast.

[Verse 12] On the twelfth day of Rizzmas, My Diddy gave to me Twelve Diddys draking Eleven fanums taxing Ten gyatts a shaking Nine moggers mogging Eight edging sessions Seven simps a simping Six glizzys glazing Five skibidis Four feining feins Three fine shyts Two Hawk Tuahs And a lunchly from MrBeast.

I got LEGOs for Christmas and my friend got her father's headstone

I told my friend that we should dress up as P. Diddy and Drake for Halloween and ask parents if their kid wants to come over for a sleepover.

A gay couple and a lesbian couple are going on a cruise who gets their first Obviously the lesbian couple they got their lickety-split. The gay couple was still packing their shit.

I did Walmart take the Juneteenth ice cream off the shelf It was only 3/5 full

When I was a kid, my father would tell me that the black Santa Claus was was coming to our house for Christmas. So, instead of putting out cookies and milk, we would put out cornbread and purple kool-aid.

I may not be as "rich" as Donald Trump, but at least I am still allowed to go on holiday to Bali, Niagara Falls, Hong Kong, and the Pyramids of Giza. Orange Jesus can't travel to these places because these places cannot grant entry to felons.

...ah, who am I kidding? It's likely that Trump is going to prison, anyway.

What do you call an Australian visiting the UK on holiday?

Returning to the scene of the crime.

What did the kid without hands get for Christmas? - I don't know, he still didn't open his present...

What do Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?

They both come while you’re asleep.

Why do the Chinese children don't believe in Santa? Because they're the ones making the toys.

my son is such a miserable brat, I bought him a brand new trampoline for christmas and all he wants to do is sit in his wheelchair and cry.

What’s the difference between Santa and my dad

Santa got the milk

Brrr it's fucking cold outside aye? What do you guys want for Christmas? A sweet video game? Maybe a cool action figure? Oh how about the latest phone! Who me? Oh I guess... I wish snow could melt as fast as the snowflakes that downvote good jokes! Merry Christmas ya filthy animals!

If I don't get a partner for Christmas this year, mistletoe won't be the only thing hanging from the ceiling.

What did Jesus say when he was left hanging on the cross? Well this is one hell of a way to spend my Easter Vacation.

What did the hermit crabs do on Mother's Day? They shellabrated their mommy.

rizz

are you a biographer cause i picture us toghether can i take a picture of you for i can show santa what i want for christmas No pen No paper you still draw my attention you know what i hate about math they always talk about x and y but not about u and i