Why do orphans love Christmas?
Because they build a home.
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?
Because they miss Mother’s Day and Father’s Day.
How do mountains get big?
They go trick-or-treating.
Picture of yo mama last Christmas and the damn thing’s still printing.
Orphans have 362 days in a year because they don’t have a Mother’s or Father’s Day and no birthday.
Why do some kids only experience 364 days per year?
Because they don't have a Father's Day.
Q: Why do Dasher and Dancer love coffee?
A: Because they're Santa's Starbucks!
Why was Santa Santa?
Because it was Santa! Hahahaha 😂😂😂😂😂😂
What time is it when you eat a Christmas tree?
Time to get a new Christmas tree! 🎄
Knock knock. Who's there? Oswald. Oswald who? Oswald my Halloween candy and now it's stuck in my throat!
Which month is the bus? December.
Why do orphans miss Mother’s Day? Because they don’t have a mother to give to!
What do orphans get on Xmas?
Lonely.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Terrier.
Terrier who?
Your Halloween decorations are terri-fying!
What do people get for Christmas when they behave badly? They get coal. Why coal, you're probably saying, because the true meaning is cucks of all kinds.
Why don't Chinese people believe in Santa Claus?
They're the ones that make the toys.
Why are Santa's balls so big?
Because he comes once a year.
What's the best part of a terrorist on Fourth of July?
The finale.
Yo momma so fat, Santa said, "Ho, ho, ho, I've gotta go!"
Why can’t mental hospitals have Halloween?
Because the patients thought the pumpkins were them. I tried.
