Holiday jokes
What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing, they haven't got family.
What time is it when you eat a Christmas tree?
Time to get a new Christmas tree! 🎄
Which month is the bus? December.
Knock knock. Who's there? Oswald. Oswald who? Oswald my Halloween candy and now it's stuck in my throat!
So a mom went to her kid and said, "If you pray to God, He will give you your sight back." So he did exactly that.
The next morning, the mom heard a scream, so she went to the kid's room and asked, "What's wrong?" The kid replied, "It didn't work!" The mom said, "April Fools!"
Memes
This Jake
Who comes once a year and makes your kids cry?
Rapey Santa.
What do orphans get at Xmas?
Lonely.
Why is Santa so jolly? Because he knows where the naughty girls live!
Why do orphans love Christmas?
Because they build a home.
How do mountains get big?
They go trick-or-treating.
Q: Why do Dasher and Dancer love coffee?
A: Because they're Santa's Starbucks!
Why was Santa Santa?
Because it was Santa! Hahahaha 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Why are there only 363 days in an orphan's calendar?
They don’t have fathers or Mother’s Day.
Orphans have 362 days in a year because they don’t have a Mother’s or Father’s Day and no birthday.
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?
Because they miss Mother’s Day and Father’s Day.
Why do some kids only experience 364 days per year?
Because they don't have a Father's Day.
What does a stuttering Santa call Mrs. Claus?
A hoe hoe hoe.
Why are Santa's balls so big?
Because he comes once a year.
Guys, what should I be for Halloween (aka tomorrow)?
Why did the skeleton not go to the party?