pro tip kids, you CAN hit an orphan because they cant cry to their parents
y r ofans bad at bassball cos thay can't hit home runs
What did the terrorist think to himself seconds before hitting the tower? “Did I leave the stove on?”
What does Santa say for the toys to go to bed? Time to hit the sack!!!!
Two atom soldiers are fighting against an army. One gets shot. He cried out, im hit! I think I've lost an electron! Are you sure? Asks the other. Im positive!
This one as actually physics(unlike some other joke here, ahem cough cough)
A german soldier is walking down the street during a hail storm when a lady suddenly falls over after being hit. He, along with a few others, walk over to her. One man asks, "What happened?" and the soldier replies, "Hail hit her." (say the joke aloud and it will make more sense)
Why are school shooting jokes so funny?
Answer: The bullets hit your funny bone!
Why did Jerry fall off the moon?
Because he got hit by a fridge.
A guy is bankrupt so he gives his son a duck and tells him to go sell it for as much as he can.so the kid goes on the street to sell the duck. A prostitute walks by and says I'll f--ck you for $10. The boy says I would but I don't have any money. She says ok I'll take the duck instead. He says ok so they go up stairs and f—ck. The prostitute says that's the best sex I've ever had. I'll give you the duck back and we can do it again. So they do and he gets the duck back. But when they go downstairs the duck gets hit by a car. And the guy that hit the duck feels so bad that he gives the kid $25. So when he gets home his father asks him why he looks so tired. The boy says well I got a f—ck for a duck, a duck for a f—ck, and $25 for a f—cked up fuck.
I was working for Space X. I was instructed to control a satellite's orbit rotation when suddenly the screen went black. I investigated and found out one of Penaldos penalty had hit and destroyed the satellite. Shame on you Penaldo for ruining my dream job!
Good night, sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite, and if they do, hit them with a shoe, till there all black and blue!
(Classic)
I'm taking a taking a guitar lesson at school, my band instructor told me he was going to hit me with my guitar, i Asked him if that was a fret
why'd sally drop her ice cream she was hit by a bus
Man, don't you hate it when you hit a speed bump by and orphanage but then relies, there's no speed bumps here...
What happens if a Asian walks into a wall with a boner. They hit there nose on the wall
Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?
Because he got hit by a bus!
Why cant orphans play baseball?
they never hit home
When I was young I got bullied by two kids, and whenever I got hit to the ground, I would get back up and cry. Then I had the courage to fight back. Except they didn't get back up.
Why did Hitlers girlfriend break up with him, he Hit-ler
There were three people on the third floor of a building the first one took a bite of a apple then said it was too hard so he threw it out the window the second person took a bite of a lemon he said it was too sour so he threw it out the window the third guy was drunk, he took a bite of a grenade and thought it was to crunchy so he threw it out the window then one of them went downstairs he saw a dog laying on the ground dead the apple had hit the dog in the head then there was a little girl crying with her cat in her lap it had died because the lemon fell out the window and hit it in the head next there was a old guy laughing i asked him why he was laugh he said "i farted and the building behind me blew up".
