Hit jokes
So NFL teams were playing football on me, and then Justin Jefferson hit something called "the gritty" on me.
I don’t know why I’m in jail. So, basically, I was at a gun range, and we were supposed to hit the targets, even though I hit it.
Life is never hard until you get hit hard with reality.
2001 called... they hit the Pentagon.
How ironic is this?! I was playing Jenga before the first plane hit the Twin Towers.
What do you get when you cross an adopted kid with a river?
Moses hits the adoption lottery!
Yo mama so fat, when she jumps, NASA says a meteor hits Earth.
Nostalgia hits you like a train.
It's so hard, you can even wake up.
John Kreese's forehead broke when silver hit 'em in the forehead.
"Bob it, twist it, pull it, hit it, turn it, twist it, slide it."
You when you face the boss the first time: :)
You when Dark Souls boss music starts playing on the second phase: :(
You when you ask why do you hear boss music: <(
You when the boss goes straight to his final phase after 1 hit:
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One time, a man got mad at me because I was hitting on his girlfriend. Like come on, man, it was only a couple of bruises!
What did Josef Vasicek think before the plane hit the ground?
"Oh shit, is my name still on the Stanley Cup?"
What did Pavol Demitra think before the Yaroslavl plane hit the ground?
"Oh shit, did I leave the stove on at home?"
An emo and a leaf fall from a tree, which hits the ground first?
The leaf, because the emo got caught by the rope.
Do you know how I lost my music teacher job?
I tried to hit G by putting D.
I can't remember the last full conversation I had with my grandfather.
Good thing is, since he hit his head, he can't remember either.
The people in the second tower, "I'm so glad that plane didn't hit our building!"
The second plane, 🗿🗿🗿
Summary of Twilight in one sentence:
Bella hits on two guys, runs away. Edward glances to Jacob saying, "Go Fetch," and suddenly Bella's his.
What do you call a Titan who can't swim?
Titanic!
Imagine the Titanic with a lisp. It would be unthinkable. My version is imagine the Titanic with a lisp, it would be unsinkable.
What did the front half of the Titanic say to the other half when it hit the iceberg? I'm breaking up with you.