Hit jokes
What happened to the blind man's son?
He thought he was hitting a piñata.
I can't remember the last full conversation I had with my grandfather.
Good thing is, since he hit his head, he can't remember either.
A blond-haired girl, a brown-haired girl, and a ginger-haired girl were out walking when they came across some tracks.
The brown-haired girl looked at them and said, "I think they are elephant tracks."
Then the ginger-haired girl looked at the tracks and said, "No way, they are definitely duck tracks."
Finally, the blond-haired girl bent down to examine the tracks when she got hit by the train.
You know, I got a SKELETON of these jokes. All are HUMERUS. Yeah, this gets under people’s SKIN, but I guess you could call their FUNNY BONE BROKEN! People try and hit me when this happens, luckily, I got THICK SKIN! Yeah, thanks for listening. Hope you got these puns down TO THE BONE!
Why did Hitler get hit by a car? Because he did Nazi that coming!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It didn't, I hit it with my car 3 blocks down.
Two atom soldiers are fighting against an army. One gets shot. He cried out, "I'm hit! I think I've lost an electron!"
"Are you sure?" asks the other.
"I'm positive!"
What grade does Sherlock hit on girls from?
Elementary, my dear Watson!
Why did Mary fall off the swings?
She got hit by a refrigerator.
When I was young, I got bullied by two kids, and whenever I got hit to the ground, I would get back up and cry. Then I had the courage to fight back, except they didn't get back up.
There once was a woman who had 10 kids. Their names were:
Tenth, Twenty, Thirty, Forty, Fifty, Sixty, Seventy, Eighty, Ninety, and One Hundred.
Everyone but Ninety died. She also had 10 kids.
These 10 kids got a dog without Ninety knowing. They had him for 2 years until he got hit by a car.
Only Ninety's kids know about this.
I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it hit me!
I never knew how to use a boomerang, until it hit me.
Dad: I get to touch animals every day at the zoo.
Kid: Why?
Dad: I clean up animal s*** at the zoo.
Your mum is so fat, she gets hit by a parked car!
When you hit a speed bump in a school zone and remember, there are no speed bumps.
What is the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One smashes open when you hit it with a sledgehammer, and the other is a watermelon.
What do you call J Cow's new hit? Deja Moo!
An apple and an emo kid fall off a tree at the same time. Who hits the ground first?
The apple, because the emo kid got caught by the rope.
Why did James fall off the swing?
He had no arms.