History jokes
Are your hairline and forehead old friends, because they go way back?
What do the twin towers and genders have in common? They used to be two, but now they're a sensitive subject.
Your forehead goes back to when Burger King was Burger Prince.
In America, you fight Ukraine.
In Soviet Russia, you fight Mykraine.
Did you know there was a record for the quickest time to finish a story? The day it was set was 9/11. 99 stories in .4 seconds.
Memes
Last words of the mayor of Hiroshima: “What the fuck was that noise?”
Aboriginals around for 50,000 years invented the spear.
Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff?
Yea, they found her “head and shoulders“ on the backseat of her car.
I believe a lot of conflict in the Wild West could have been avoided completely if cowboy architects had just made their towns big enough for everyone...
Whoever killed Adolf Hitler is MY hero!
Q: What does Abraham Lincoln have in common with a poor quality pirated movie?
A: They were both shot in a theater.
Your hairline goes so far back it went back to when Earth was created.
Imagine the Russians showing up late to the 1917 revolution with a Tsarbucks in hand. They were late, so I guess they weren't Russian. They were probably Stalin.
Flippity floppity, women are property.
My grandpa personally killed 3 German pilots. He was the worst mechanic Luftwaffe had.
I don’t usually tell 9/11 jokes, they usually crash and burn.
Are you George Floyd?
'Cause baby, you take my breath away... OOF!
What did the Nazi say when a doll hit his daughter?
A-doll Hitler!
What happens when a furry takes over Nazi Germany?
The Furred Reich.
Boi, you're the reason the Great Wall of China is a thing. You're so ugly the Chinese needed to block you out!