History jokes
Steel led to World War 2.
In the Middle Ages it was illegal for a blind man to become a king.
I mean, I don't see why not.
Your mama so old, her first Christmas was the first Christmas!
My grandpa died in 9/11.
He was the best pilot.
In a deep village in Germany, an old man asked his granddaughter, "What are you doing?"
His granddaughter replies, "Removing Polish with chemicals."
Grandpa said, "When I was young, I did the same."
An Aboriginal Australian told me that I was on his farmland.
So I told him he was on my cock.
(I'm Australian btw, respect to my American bros🇺🇸)
What did the Americans call the Battle of Midway after Pearl Harbor?
The Jap trap.
"Popcorn" means "Photo-Oxidant formation by Plant-emitted Compounds and OH Radicals in Northeastern Germany."
"HO" means a woman, in particular one who has many casual sexual encounters or relationships. So basically, popcorn is a woman in plant based sex encountered a lot in a nazi camp.
Christopher Columbus: *Sees native Americans* Can I see your land?
Native Americans: Sure, just be care..........
Christopher Columbus: Boonk gang whole lot of gang shit.
A young girl was playing in the park with her mother when she asked the question, "Mummy, what's that building over there?" The mother looked at the prison, smiled, and said, "That's where the cotton pickers live."
Why was the Roman soldier kicked out of the army? Because he was "Romin" around during war.
You know how many people said, "This ship will never sink?"
They jinxed it by saying "never sink."
Few jokes (sorry if they have already been used).
1 I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
2 Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he always has a great fall.
3 Have you heard the one about the skunk? Never mind, it really stinks.
4 It's always windy in a sports arena. All those fans.
5 What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!
6 Comic Sans walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your type here."
7 What's the easiest way to get straight As? Use a ruler.
8 Why were they called the Dark Ages? Because there were lots of knights.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims of course, they went through 89 stories in only 5 minutes!
How does Hitler tie his shoes?
Into little Nazis.
Who's Hitler's best friend? Nazis me.
Why did the Romans build straight roads? So the Pakis (bastards) didn't build corner shops.
Why can't America play chess?
They're already missing 2 towers.
The ocean will kill you to death expensively if you're on Titanic. Buying the tickets was a waste of money.
Ever heard the saying white people can’t jump??
Well, I think that’s total bullshit. You should have seen us on 9/11!