History jokes
Why did the Titanic sink? Because it saw an iceberg selling candy.
The Twin Towers ordered pepperoni pizza, but got plane.
What does Hitler's partner say when he begins?
"Hindin!"
Teacher: Jeff, why did you throw a paper plane at the twins?
Jeff: You wouldn't get it, miss.
"the floor is lava!"
- everyone, Pompeii 79 A.D.
Why are Americans so bad at Chess?
They're missing two towers.
How did Princess Diana cross the road?
Through the windshield!
Nah, I'm Hawaiian but I'm also Japanese. So does that mean I bombed my own harbor?
Hey, America. No towers? :(
My friend group is pretty diverse. I'm Japanese, one friend is Filipino, one is American, one is Italian, and the last one is German.
Out of everyone in the friend group, the Filipino and the American were the quickest to feel uncomfortable when I asked, "Who wants to go on a march with me?"
Why did the Twin Towers fall exactly at 9/11?
Because the terrorists thought that it would be fun to call 911 as a "prank."
What do you call the original immigrants to the British Isles?
Anglosaxon.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims: they went through a hundred stories in 10 seconds.
Why shouldn't you get in a fight with a dinosaur?
You'll get jur ass kicked.
Why does 9/11 only get a day, but Pride gets an entire month?
Because pride is a bigger tragedy.
Why did Hitler's cookies taste bad? He forgot to clean out the oven.
What war game can the French win? None, they are always losing.
What's the difference to a kamikaze and bin Ladin?
Bin Ladin survived when he went into a building. I have aids.
Why can't a dodo fly? Cus it suicided when it saw you will be born soon.
What is the difference between Kanye and Hitler?
Hitler knew when his career was over.